The Corruption of a Vampire Slayer
by frosty600
Summary: Buffy Summers a girl considered to be mentally ill by her family is signed into an insane asylum by her parents who don't know what else to do. There she has to meet with a shrink for an hour every day; a shrink that looks an awful lot like the vampire that haunts her dreams. Is she crazy or is something else far more sinister at work? Pairing: Buffy/Angel/us
1. Chapter 0

**Disclaimer:** I don't own Buffy the Vampire Slayer or any of the characters mentioned in the cannon.

**A/N:** So here we are at the start of a new story… I hope that you all enjoy this beginning as much as I enjoyed writing it. Just a small warning that I'm sure all of my regular readers will know by now when it comes to Angelus being part of one of my stories that it isn't going to be fluffy. Something I'm sure the title suggests as well, but even so here's a heads up. **Warning story will contain dark content.** Again I'm sure that this doesn't come as a surprise lol.

**PRELUDE**

Buffy stared at a random patch of carpet just above where her feet were resting, her hands curled into tight fists on top of her thighs as she waited for this session to be over; not liking to stare at the handsome doctor that was sitting before her, a pen and clipboard on his lap. Out of all the things she had to do in the strict routines she had been forced to adhere to she hated having to come here the most since she had been locked up in Sunnydale's Asylum for the mentally disturbed. She hated seeing his face… that face that haunted her. She could feel his dark brown eyes staring at her intently; watching her. She heard him tap his pen against his clipboard and she shifted a little in her seat, wanting the session to hurry up and be over. She really, really hated having to come in here day after day.

Angel stopped tapping his pen against his clipboard, more than half the session had passed in silence as he hoped that today would be the day that she would start talking to him, but she hadn't… Angel sighed and uncrossed his legs. "Buffy, for the past 3 weeks, you've sat in that chair every day and said absolutely nothing. How am I supposed to help you get back out into the real world if you don't talk to me?" He asked, hoping that this tact would work better than the others he had tried over the time he had spent with her.

Buffy's hands tightened further, turning her knuckles white as she pressed her hands harshly into her thighs. His words so similar to the words her mother had said to her. _'Buffy, please talk to us, how can we help if you don't talk to us?'_ She could hear her mother's voice ringing in her ears… Unintentionally Buffy lifted her gaze to the handsome dark haired, dark eyed doctor, flinching as she gazed at his face; her eyes glancing at the two small white hospital grade Band-Aids covering the small cut she had given him the very first time she had entered this room and seen him for the very first time… "Talking is what got me in this place to begin with." She muttered flatly, her arms coming up to cross over her chest defensively.

Angel nodded and made a small notation on the page that was securely clipped to his clipboard. "Your parents only wished to help you. They did what they believed necessary to get you well." He tried reassuring her. "It is natural, however, to feel some form of betrayal or anger." He added in an attempt to explain, wanting to let her know that what she was feeling was natural, but to his surprise Buffy shook her head.

"I'm not angry." She replied with firm belief.

"Then, why…" Angel tried to ask, only to trail off as Buffy sighed; a deep sigh full of emotion, her gaze flicking down to the carpet once again, preferring it to his familiar handsome face. Her silence was telling and he nodded in sudden understanding. "You think that if you stop talking about it, everything would just go away." The look of surprise that she shot up at him, confirming the conclusion he had come to.

Angel made another notation, before he lay down his pen for a moment as he focused his gaze on the petite young woman that was sitting in front of him; her arms crossed over her chest defensively. "I won't deny that that might work eventually." He admitted glad that after 3 weeks of trying he had finally gotten her to speak to him; was actually getting somewhere after so long. "With some delusions, but, Buffy if I did send you home now, nothing will have changed. You'll still be struggling as you were before; still are." He saw Buffy shift her position in her chair, drawing her feet up closer to her; as if trying to protect herself from his words. "But in here I can help you overcome the demons that plague you." Buffy flinched again even as her gaze went up to him again. "Don't you want to re-join your friends and complete your last year of high school? Be able to have a normal life?"

Buffy returned her gaze to her knees, her eyes burning with unshed tears as his words whirled around her brain… sounding so tempting… so reasonable… but how could she trust him… the man that looked so much like… 'him'. "Because Buffy, as much as I would like to, I can't authorize your release back into society until we've defeated what's plaguing your mind." Angel remained silent for an extended moment as he stared at Buffy letting the words sink in as she continued to stare at her knees. "I suggest you think on that, before our next appointment."

Buffy looked up at him again, surprised once again. "But isn't there still like," Glancing over at the clock hung up on the wall. "15 minutes of this torture?" She asked, never had Angel let her go early before. He made sure to use every moment of their sessions.

'_Torture?'_ Angel thought a little put out; he never thought that he was bad enough company to be considered a torture to be around. "There is still a bit more time, but I would like you to think about what we've discussed today and how you'd like to progress. If you want to continue fighting me every step of the way or if you want to work hard and go back to your life."

Buffy frowned, his words getting to her more than she liked. He wasn't supposed to make her want to open up. She was supposed to sit here and remain silent until they believed that she was over what had put her in here. "If you like you can sit in that chair for the remaining few minutes." He offered. Buffy remained still; almost frozen as she stared at her knees like they held all the answers she needed, before she seemed to regain herself somewhat and she uncurled herself from huddled position she had shifted into and stood from her chair silently, her gaze going to him involuntarily once again; her hazel gaze looking at him with consideration for the first time since she'd met him. "I'll see you tomorrow, Buffy," He told her dismissively.

Buffy stared at him for a moment as her mind continued to tick over what he had told her today, before she turned and headed for the door. Angel watched her go until the door closed behind her, before he picked up his pen once again and began writing on the page, filling up the blank lines with the impressions he'd gotten from her. A smile curling up his lips at the feeling of success he had at finally getting her to start talking. Sure it hadn't been anything to do with the dreams that she was having, but it was a start… and now he had planted a seed in her mind. A seed that he hoped would grow over the rest of the day until their next appointment and lead her to make the decision that was best for her. She was a bright a girl, so he was hopeful that the decision she came to was the one that would have her telling him about the dreams that were so real to her that her parents had, had her admitted into here.

*****B/A/us***B/A/us*****

Buffy sat quietly on a bench as she stared out over the grass watching as small groups of her fellow psychiatric patients wandered around; doing the various activities that were set out under the watchful eyes of a few of the nurses that were milling about. Buffy paid them no mind as she sat hunched forward; her hands curled tightly around the granite stone of the bench, her gaze lowering to the grass at her feet. Doctor O'Conner's words running through her mind over and over like a broken record that kept jumping to the same track. A frown darkening her brow as she once again felt the hot prick of tears pressing against the backs of her eyes.

She did want things to go back to the way they were; she wanted to be able to hang out with her friends again… not that it really felt like she had those anymore. None of them had come to visit her; not even her parents… not even her mother, who lived not even a 15 minute drive away… not even once in the 3 weeks that she had been locked up in here. It made her crave the night when she was over taken by the dreams that were so poignant and life like that they had to be memories; memories of what seemed to be a previous life of hers or something of the like. They felt to real to not be true and at night the people in them kept her company; making the nights more bearable than her days; despite how disturbing she found them when she was awake… the things that happened; the things she did… who she was once supposed to be…

Buffy felt a shudder run over her and she gave herself a shake. She hadn't always had the memories; like she did now and it was those memories that had driven her parents into putting her in here. Buffy sighed and looked up at the sky, her teeth worrying her lower lip as she continued to think; trying to decide what she should do… if putting her trust in the Doctor that looked so much like the demon in her night world; the one that started everything…

"You really are an unsociable kinda gal, aren't ya?" A female voice spoke to her, interrupting, Buffy's musings; as the petite blond startled and stared up at the taller brunette woman she had seen around the asylum since her own arrival here, but she'd never spoken to the woman before and never really intended to. Uninvited, the brunette sat down beside her on the bench. "Don't worry. I'm not gonna hurt ya." She assured Buffy, reacting off the somewhat uncertain look the blond was giving her. "I've been watching you since you've been here, and you don't seem near as dull as the rest of the freeloading idiots that are in this hell hole."

Buffy blinked at her in surprise. "How'd you figure that? All I've done is sit since I've gotten here."

Faith gave her a grin. "Now, we both know that's not true. You attacked Doctor Hotty on your first day. I'd hardly call that sitting." The brunette said with a loud laugh.

Buffy winced, she hadn't meant to attack Doctor O'Conner, but when she'd seen him and he'd started trying to talk as if he knew nothing; she'd gotten angry along with the shock of seeing him in her waking world. That was before she'd realized that the Doc, though he looked exactly like the man in her dreams; he most definitely wasn't. He was nothing like the demon of her past; except in looks. In looks he could be the vampire's twin… or doppelganger. "I'm Faith, by the way." The tall brunette introduced herself.

"Buffy." She replied, finding that it felt good to finally be able to talk to someone that wasn't wearing a lab-coat or sitting in a comfy chair with a clipboard in hand.

Faith nodded. "So, B. What are you in here for?" She asked conversationally.

Buffy looked away from her new companion uncomfortably, before she shrugged. "Dreams." She finally answered softly; not wanting to get into details with a virtual stranger; besides she had a feeling that details wasn't what the brunette was after.

"Bad dreams?" Faith teased; her tone slightly mocking. "That's a pity, they'll have you all respectable and out of here, before we can get a chance to really bond."

Buffy shifted uncomfortably. "What about you? What are you in for?" She asked, mainly to take the spotlight off of her, rather than curiosity.

"Oh, me?" She murmured with an innocent air and a shrug. "I just got me a bit of a temper problem." Buffy looked at Faith confused as she wondered what kind of temper you would have to have to get you locked up in place like this. "And I happen to be a sex fiend… well the Doc calls it something that means 'sex addict', but I think sex fiend sounds more interesting."

"How'd that end you up in here?" Buffy asked curiously.

Faith smiled mischievously. "I tried to have sex with a crocodile." Buffy stared at Faith in shock; her hazel eyes wide as she tried to imagine what that would look like, or even how it could be done when Faith burst into laughter and Buffy rolled her eyes and turned her face away from Faith once again with a small huff. "Damn, B. I knew you were gullible, but geez!" Faith almost cackled through her laughter. Buffy remained annoyed for a moment, before Faith's laughter infected her and she too began laughing; a smile lighting up her face like it hadn't since she'd been put in here.

Their merriment was interrupted by one of the nurses; who'd taken in their close proximity with growing disapproval. "Faith, not so close." The nurse said firmly. "Slide back a little if you please." Faith sighed and slid over further on the bench. The nurse nodded her approval and swept away, her stride full of purpose.

"Stodgy old bat." Faith grumbled sourly.

"What was that all about?" Buffy questioned, never having seen a nurse do that before.

"Oh, they're scared I might be overcome and ravish you." Faith gave Buffy a once over. "They might not be far off the mark this time. You are rather hot." Before Buffy could do more than blink in surprise at her statement, Faith leaned in quickly and placed a firm kiss to Buffy's lips, before jumping up and darting away with a laugh as the nurses and a couple of security guards chased after her.

Buffy watched the commotion for a short moment, before the bell tolled signalling that their outside time was over. Not wanting to be penalised Buffy got up and began trudging inside along with the others; who were safe enough to be allowed outside privileges. Her mind once again turning to what the shrink had told her; perhaps she would try talking to him, if it did what he said it would and what Faith seemed to think it would do. The memories might just go away and despite the fact that they helped her cope with the loneliness of being in here… she wouldn't need them on the outside world and things could go back to the way they were before the memories. _'And maybe dad would come back home… or they could move up to L.A. to be with him.'_ Buffy thought hopefully.

**A/N:** Ok, so I hope you all enjoyed the introduction to this story. As always I'm more than interested in knowing what you all think :)


	2. Chapter 1

**Disclaimer:** I don't own Buffy the Vampire Slayer of any of the characters mentioned in the cannon.

**A/N:** Thank you to everyone who showed an interest in this story. I couldn't believe the response I got for the prelude. I hope that you all enjoy this first chapter as much as the introduction to this story. I also hope that it helps to answer at least some of the questions posed to me in the reviews :)

**CHAPTER 1**

Angel looked up from his papers as the door to his office opened and Buffy stepped in looking a little nervous to his keen observant eyes as she held her hands interlaced tightly in front of her. "Buffy, right on time," He greeted as he turned in his chair to face her.

Buffy grimaced a little. "Like nurse 'stickler-for-punctuality' here would ever let me be late." She grumbled as she crossed her arms over her chest uncomfortably as she lowered her gaze from the doctor; still finding it disconcerting that he looked so much like the vampire in her vivid memories of her past.

Angel looked past Buffy to the nurse who was still standing in the doorway waiting for Buffy to be settled; a nervous look on her face as if scared that after three weeks the petite blond would launch herself at him like she had done during her first session with him. "Thanks Lottie, I can take it from here." He informed the nurse with a friendly smile.

Lottie returned the smile and nodded her head. "Ok, Angel." She murmured shooting one last look at the girl she considered unstable, before turning and leaving the office.

Buffy shuffled towards the chair; dragging her feet with every step. Her usual reluctance of this room and its purpose returning in full force now that it was time to follow through with her decision to trust that Doctor O'Conner could get her back to her normal life if she opened herself up to him like she had done her parents in a desperate attempt to make them understand… only for them to decide that she was crazy.

"I hope that you thought about what we discussed yesterday." Angel broke the silence as he got up from his office chair and moved towards his far more comfortable looking 'shrink' chair that sat across from hers; knowing from experience that Buffy would not be the first to speak.

Buffy sighed deeply; wishing that she could put this moment off for longer, the idea of placing her trust in a shrink that she barely knew… a shrink who was the exact image of the vampire that would use every word as a way to manipulate her into his clutches as he had done in her past life. "I did." Buffy admitted and shifted uncomfortably as she felt the Doctors gaze staring at her intently as he waited for her answer. Slowly she raised her gaze to his and as she met his dark gaze she sighed again. "And I want to be able to go back to my life."

Angel smiled delighted. "That's wonderful, Buffy. And a great start to getting back the life you had, before your mind betrayed you."

Buffy lowered her gaze from his again; her hands clasping together in her lap as she twisted her interlocked fingers in her unease. "And you're certain this will work? The whole telling you about my memories of the past thing," She asked as she wrenched her hands apart becoming aware of the fact that she was twisting her fingers back and forth in her anxiety.

Angel took in her anxious body language and hooked his pen in the metal clip at the top of the board. "Talking about what happens in your 'dreams'" Angel was careful to put more emphasis on the word; determined to one day soon have Buffy realize that her dreams were just that dreams. Dreams that when they were done would trouble her no more. "Will help me to understand what is going on in your head and will enable me to help you regain your life."

Buffy nodded and released another sighing breath; her hands gripping the tops of her thighs hard enough to leave faint bruises in their wake. Before she leaned back against the padded couch wanting to appear more relaxed than she felt in that moment as her mind whirled around the decision she had come to time and again as all of yesterday she had made her choice and then thought about it again as her resolve wavered between her desire to be free of this place and her reluctance to open herself up to a virtual stranger. "If I do this… if I begin telling you of the 'memories' I experience whilst I sleep. There will be no stopping it once I've begun… I'll have to tell you everything… regardless of embarrassment." She warned him; more than half hoping that she could dissuade him from wanting to hear of things she had done in that past life.

Angel graced her with a small smile that he hoped was as encouraging as he thought it was. "My job is to help you, Buffy no matter what you tell me I will never judge you. I will only seek to use the information you give me to help heal you." Angel assured her; and Buffy's eyes sought out his again. "Besides I doubt very much that you could tell me anything that would truly shock me."

"You'd be surprised." Buffy muttered under her breath as she crossed her arms over her chest defensively feeling exposed at just the thought of telling him of the past she experienced in her dreams. Slowly Buffy uncrossed her arms, letting them rest on top of her thighs again as she stared at her asylum appointed shrink. "So… how does this work, Doc?" She asked, doing her best to sound glib and unaffected whilst her heart was beating an uncomfortable tattoo in her chest.

"Well, basically you talk and I listen." Angel replied.

Buffy's eyes fell to the pen and clipboard in his hand. _'And make little notes to record just how crazy you think I am.'_ She thought a touch bitterly. "Well, duh Doc Obvious… I was more wondering… on how to start. I've never had a shrink before."

Angel clicked the ball point of his pen down. "How about you start were your most comfortable." He suggested encouragingly eager to just get Buffy talking so that he could start building on the small amount of trust she'd placed in him after 3 weeks of getting nowhere with her, but to his disappointment Buffy remained silent. Angel sighed. "Buffy," He began.

"I know, I know." She cut him off as she fidgeted in her seat. "I'm sorry." Buffy apologised as she tucked her feet up onto the couch she was sitting on. "It's just last time I tried talking about this it got me locked up in this loony bin." Buffy shrugged. "So, there really isn't anything about it that I find comfortable."

"Ok," Angel murmured, seeing that Buffy wanted some guidance to get her started. "How about you start with the day the dreams started." He offered. "Was there something different about that day?" He prompted.

Buffy frowned thoughtfully for a moment as she thought back to that day that seemed so long ago now; the day that had started it all. "No, it was just another day. I went to school hung out with my friends…" Buffy suddenly sat up a little straighter in her chair. "But that night… there was something different about that night."

"Different how?" Angel asked his pen poised and at the ready to begin taking notes.

"I was out with friends at a club that allows all ages and I felt someone watching me." Buffy gave Angel a little shrug. "I know, it's a club not such a strange thing even a club in Sunnydale. But it felt different."

"What felt different?" Angel asked, the tip of his pen resting on the paper clipped to his board now.

Buffy shrugged helplessly as she tried to think of how to explain it for a long moment. "It-It felt like the eyes could see right through me. Right down to the bone," Buffy finally came up with and gave herself a little nod, believing that that was as close as she was going to get to explaining the feeling of those eyes on her.

"Did you ever see the person these eyes belonged to?" Angel asked curiously.

Buffy shook her head. "No, but I felt them on me… right up until I got home and drew the blinds."

Angel nodded and moved his pen across the page writing the word 'paranoia' at the top of the page a small question mark beside the dot pointed word. "Ok, so that was all that was unusual before the dreams started?" He asked.

"Yeah, all the rest was a normal day in the life." Buffy quipped softly.

"And then that night your dreams started?" Angel questioned seeking to confirm the small amount he knew.

"Yep," Buffy confirmed with a nod that was deeper than it needed to be.

Angel fought back his desire to smile at the action as he turned his gaze back down to his clipped down notepad as he began scribbling once again. 'Dreams started shortly after paranoia'.

"And they're memories not dreams." Buffy tacked on firmly.

Angel let out a slow breath and nodded his head. "Ok," He murmured agreeably not wanting to put her on the defensive by challenging her delusion. He needed to understand it more before he could even begin to start attempting to heal her of that. "How about you tell me about the first memory of this past life you experienced." He suggested, his gaze focused intently waiting for her response. Hoping more than he had ever hoped with any of his other patients in this hospital that Buffy would open up to him and let him help her.

"The first one," Buffy murmured as she glanced down at her knees a frown marring her brow once again. "You know one of the things that still continues' to surprise me the most about these memories."

"No, I don't." Angel replied his pen resting idly between his fingers as he took in Buffy's body language.

"It's the fact that no matter how many of the dreams I've had they are all as clear in my mind as the night I first had them." Buffy explained softly as she lifted her eyes from her knees.

"I doubt that's anything unusual. You're focusing on them, continuously thinking about them. So, of course you're going to remember them. You're not allowing the memory of them to fade."

Buffy nodded the reasoning making sense to her. The memories of her past she was seeing in her dreams were often in her thoughts; especially now that she was in here with much less to distract her from them. "I guess." She murmured as she reached up and brushed some of her hair back behind her ear.

Buffy sighed as she straightened up in the chair; letting her feet touch the ground again her eyes landing on the familiar patch of carpet she spent most of her time looking at in silence for the past 3 weeks. "The first memory of my past life I received started in the living room of a strange old man's house…"

*****B/Aus***B/Aus*****

Buffy sat uncomfortably in the living room of the strange Englishman that had approached her on the steps of her high school. _'How did I let myself get talked into coming here?'_ She thought as she gazed at the towering bookcases that filled the living room; each of them filled to bursting with books of all different sizes. The smell of musty old books and tea strong in the room; she could hear the man puttering around in the kitchen he had disappeared to upon seating her in his cluttered living room. Lowering her gaze, it landed on her knees and for the first time she noticed that they were nervously jumping up and down with her agitation. Taking a breath Buffy forced herself to relax the muscles in her legs and to her relief their nervous dance stopped. Lifting her gaze from her knees it fell on a book that had been left open carelessly on the coffee table that the furniture in the living room was centred around.

Leaning towards the coffee table; she angled her head sightly to see what was on the open pages, a small frown darkening her brow when the black ink that formed the words didn't make any sense to her eyes. Reaching out she turned the book towards her slightly so that she could better see the words; only for her eyes to land on a square black and white image on the top left hand corner of the page closest to her. Her frown deepened as she tried to make sense of the strange image until suddenly the image became horribly clear to her eyes… she had no idea what it was, but it was hideous and had her heart picking up speed with fear. _'Just what kind of crazy nut-bar have I been dragged into?'_ She thought with no small amount of trepidation.

Buffy jumped and hurriedly shifted the book back to its previous position on the coffee table and leaned back in the couch chair she had taken when urged to sit by her strange host when she heard something clack in the sink and footsteps moving back towards the living room; not wanting to be caught snooping. "Thank you for waiting." Merrick said as he re-entered his living room carrying a tray laden with a tea pot and two tea cups filled with the carefully brewed tea. "I'm afraid that the brewing of the tea can take longer than most American's are used to." He offered in explanation as he set the tray down onto the coffee table. Buffy shrugged as she took the steaming cup she was offered; her nose crinkling slightly as she inhaled the scent she found strange… the same scent that seemed to be part of the very air of the house. Looking down at the warm coloured amber liquid in the fragile china cup Buffy swallowed thickly, her nervousness at being here making her stomach churn with the feeling of large butterflies flapping around in her stomach. "Tea isn't really my drink." She excused as she sat the tea cup back down on the saucer that had been left in the tray.

"Something you have in common with most other Americans." Merrick observed, distaste colouring his tone as he took a sip of his own tea. "I would offer coffee, but I have none."

Buffy clasped together her hands in her lap. "Could we just get to the point of why I'm here?" She asked, not really wanting to get into the conversation she considered crazy, but not wanting to stay in this house with a man Buffy was sure was a card or two short of a full deck up stairs. What with the amount of crazy that had fallen from his mouth. It was only because he had threatened to follow her all the way to the front door of her home; a prospect she found far to horrifying to endure, that she had agreed to accompany him to his house to 'discuss' his crazy ideas.

Merrick lowered his tea cup. "As I told you, you have a destiny that must be fulfilled." He told her calmly; his voice filled with certainty.

Buffy frowned and silently wished that she still had her lollipop to busy her hands with, but the stick was now in a bin the sweet sticky candy completely devoured on the drive over. "I don't have a destiny though. I'm most definitely destiny-less." She murmured in an echo of how she had replied upon the stone steps of Hemery High. "Unless it is to become the Prom Queen in my senior year," She tacked on with a bright bubbly smile full of hope for the future she envisioned for herself… the only future she found of worth… everything else was far beneath her notice.

Merrick shook his head at her. "You've got a far more important destiny then that of an idle school girl dream."

Buffy's expression fell and her eyes hardened; hazel eyes flashing angrily at him for daring to make light of her dream… her destiny. "Idle school girl dream?!" She exclaimed heatedly as she leaned forward in her chair. "Do you have any idea the amount of work that goes into even getting nominated for Prom Queen?" She asked, but didn't wait for Merrick to reply as she began blistering his ears with the work she had already began to put in… work that she had immediately started upon becoming a freshman in the high school. "It's not just finding a dress and the perfect hair and makeup artist for the night… though that can take years as well especially the dress part. I heard that last years Prom Queen didn't find her dress to the last minute and she'd been searching since the beginning of freshman year. God I hope that doesn't happen to me; I couldn't even begin to imagine the panic if I hadn't found my dress and Prom was like only two weeks away," Buffy took a breath and got back on track. "Then there's the whole campaigning thing. Gotta start that early… like really early…"

"Miss Summers," Merrick cut her off, not quite sure he could believe the level of self-absorbedness the girl was displaying. He knew that an American would be difficult, but when he had flown out from London he hadn't expected anything like this… someone like this girl. "You are going to have to set aside such childish dreams."

Buffy frowned at him again. "So, what do you have that is so much better than my dreams?" She asked with annoyance as she crossed her arms over her chest; staring at him heatedly.

Merrick cleared his throat and set aside his tea as he straightened himself in his seat importantly; not that he had been slouching to begin with. "The most important destiny of mankind," Merrick informed her and Buffy swallowed thickly the important tone of his voice sending shivers down her spine and gooseflesh to rise up over her arms. "The saviour and protector of the human race," He revelled to her and Buffy's entire body froze in her shock and disbelief at what she had heard.

*****B/A/us***B/A/us*****

"The saviour and protector of the human race?" Angel asked unable to keep from speaking in his surprise.

Buffy smiled slightly at Doctor O'Conner. "Uh-huh, and I haven't even gotten to the big old spiel that he gave me.

"Spiel?" Angel asked as he turned to a fresh page, his pen poised at the ready.

Buffy nodded. "Yep. It goes a little something like this. Into every generation a Slayer is born. One girl in all the world, a Chosen One." Buffy took a breath as the rest of the long winded spiel filled her head… she could practically hear Merrick's voice as he recited it to her like it was the most important thing in the world to him… and she supposed considering his job; it kinda was. "She alone will wield the strength and skill to fight the vampires, demons and the forces of darkness. To stop the spread of their evil and the swell of their number. She is The Slayer." She finished reciting.

Angel was silent for an extended moment as he finished taking dictation of the spiel wanting to analyse it later; believing that it could be very important in breaking through the delusion that had taken over Buffy's world. "So, vampires and demons are real?" Angel asked, keeping his voice neutral not wanting his patient to feel like he was judging her with the question.

Buffy shrugged. "Well yeah. In my past life I fought and killed a few. So yeah, they exist." She watched as he made a quick notation on his clipboard, before looking away a sudden feeling that she was being judged and what he was writing down was just more ammunition to keep her locked up in here. Buffy gave her head a small shake as she focused her mind. _'He's trying to help me get back to my life.'_ She assured herself even as she eyed the clipboard nervously wishing that he didn't have it.

"How did you react to being," Angel paused as he wondered how to phrase it.

"Called." Buffy supplied helpfully.

"Called?" Angel repeated, making the word into a question.

Buffy nodded. "It's what Merrick called it."

"Ok," Angel nodded. "How did you react when you were Called?" He asked; prompting Buffy into continuing to recount her first dream.

"How any sane person would react, I freaked." Buffy informed him.

*****B/Aus***B/Aus*****

Buffy stared at Merrick with wide eyes overwhelmed into silence for the moment by the shock of hearing what she just had. "I'm The What, now?!" She exclaimed incredulously.

"The Slayer." Merrick supplied calmly. "The Chosen one, Called to duty to protect the world against the evil that dwells in the shadows…"

"No, nu-uh, no way!" Buffy exclaimed as she jumped up off the couch and snatched up her book bag; flinging the strap over her shoulder. "I'm not the girl you're looking for! My destiny is to be The Princess of Hemery High and to be Crowned Prom Queen! That is as far as my destiny goes! So find some other girl to pull this crazy stuff on!" Buffy shouted her heart pounding fearfully in her chest. She didn't like the sound of a single thing this Merrick guy had said! It sounded scary and insane and against everything that she was and lived for now!

Turning Buffy hurried for the door wanting to leave the stuffy Englishman's home and his crazy ideas far behind, but his voice calling after her made her pause unwillingly; her body trembling with fear and tension. "There is no one else! Only you have the power to do this, Miss Summers!"

Buffy swallowed thickly tears pooling in her eyes. "Then I guess you're out of luck." She muttered, before continuing towards the door. Her hand closed around the door handle and she pulled it open, but froze before making a step to leave the house as Merrick called out to her again.

"I'll be at the Rose-Pine Cemetery tonight. If you decide that you would like to learn more about what you've become and the duties that are now yours to perform."

Buffy didn't bother replying as she raced out the door, slamming it shut behind her; not for a moment believing that she would be going to Rose-Pine Cemetery that night. The last thing she wanted was to learn more about this whole crazy mess. She just wanted to forget all about what happened tonight after school!

Back in the apartment Buffy was completely unaware of the damage she had done to Merrick's front door as she went racing down the street. Wanting to get far away from Merrick's as fast as she could in that moment, for the first time in her life not caring what other people thought of her; just wanting to get to the safety of her home.

Buffy opened the door to her family home relief filling her at finally making it home. The trek from the strange Englishman's house having been longer than she was used to; though strangely she didn't feel tired from the run and then long walk. Her relief was short lived as she closed the front door behind her the angry raised voices of her parents sounding loudly through the house. Buffy let out a short pained sigh as she stood in front of the door. Her parents were in the living room she could see the shadows in the hallway as they moved and gestured angrily at each other. Sighing quietly once again, Buffy prepared to move wanting to sneak past her parents not wanting to draw their wrath onto her.

Hurrying past the living room, her steps sounding louder against the floor tiles than she would of liked, but her parents voices where obviously to loud for them to even register the fact that she had even come home let alone was hurrying past them to avoid them whilst they were arguing; arguing about something that was probably insignificant, but was enough for them to go off at each other like it was the end of the world…

Buffy made it to the stairs and hurried up them wanting to quickly make it to the sanctity of her room. Where she could at least feel a little removed from her parents bickering, not that a closed door was enough to drown out their voice completely, but it gave her some distance and there was a lock on her door as small and flimsy locking as it was. It was at least something that felt like it kept her safe and separate from the angry noise that was her parents raised voices.

*****B/A/us***B/A/us*****

Angel jotted down a small note, 'Issues with parents?' before looking up at Buffy as she paused to take a breath. "How is your relationship with your parents?" He asked and almost immediately Buffy's expression turned uncomfortable and shifted in her seat.

"It's fine." She mumbled, the lie obvious in her every gesture. Angel raised an eyebrow at her. "It may not be the best… I mean my mom hasn't visited once since I got in here… and mom and dad divorced when things with me were getting messy… before they both decided that I needed more help than they could provide. But that doesn't mean that its' totally… horrible…"

Angel nodded, but underlined the last note he had taken, believing that the question mark was no longer needed. "And your parents in this past life… who are they?"

Buffy blinked at him in confusion. "The same ones I've always had." She said with a tone that made it clear that in that moment she thought that he was slow.

Angel smiled believing that he had found the chink in Buffy's delusion. "Buffy, how can these dreams you are having be of a past life if the parents in your dreams are the same ones you have now?"

Buffy frowned deeply, her heart pounding wildly in her chest as his words rang loudly in her ears. "They have to be." She muttered under her breath. "Why would they be so real if-if they weren't…" Buffy's breathing became rapid as she began to panic. "Why would I dream of doing the things that I've done… if it wasn't something I've done in a past life… Why… Why would I do such things?" Buffy babbled as her panic grew as everything that her brain was telling her that she had done circled through her mind like a crashing wave mocking and taunting her with all the depraved, sick and twisted things she had done in that life… but if the Doc was right and this wasn't a past life… then what life had she done it in… this one? She didn't remember… but then… that could be why she was having the dreams. Her minds way of reminding her… punishing her for all the bad things she'd done…

Buffy let out a cry as she began to rock back and forth on the chair her body shaking as she began to cry hysterically. Angel let out a soft curse; he'd meant the question as a gentle prod… to nudge her into accepting that the world she was dreaming of wasn't real. "Buffy," Angel tried as he began walking towards her with careful steps. "Buffy, calm down, everything's going to be alright." He tried to assure her as he squatted down in front of her. "Buffy I need you to calm down." He tried again when her only response was to continue crying and rocking herself. "You're going to be ok, you just need to calm down, Buffy."

Buffy turned her gaze to him, as she still rocked her breathing mostly hiccups now as she tried to breath around the mental stress she was feeling. "H-How can you say that?!" She asked incredulously. "You don't have any idea what I've done! If the stuff in my dreams… in my memories isn't from a past life it has to be from this one. Same parents right so this life!" Buffy fisted her hands in his white lab coat and pulled him closer …

Or maybe she pulled herself closer Angel wasn't sure in that moment as he took in her wide hazel eyes that were filled with horror and a terror he felt horrible for raising in her with just one misplaced question. But at the same time he couldn't help but wonder what exactly it was she saw in her dreams to make her react this way. "You should lock me away and throw away the key!" Buffy told him agitatedly.

"I need help in here!" He called out to those behind the door, never taking his eyes off Buffy's as the door opened and a security guard and a nurse briskly walked in. The nurse assessed the situation quickly, before hurrying over to a drawer and pulled out a thin looking syringe. She tested the needle, making sure it wasn't blocked and that she didn't inject any air into the girl's vein.

Angel grasped Buffy's arms to help keep her steady as the nurse approached with the needle and swiftly injected the medication that would help calm Buffy down. "You're going to be fine, Buffy." Angel assured her as the nurse stuck tape over a cotton ball to stop any bleeding from the small round wound the needle had left.

"Why?" Was Buffy's only soft reply, her mind still focused on her delusion and not on Angel's words.

Angel sighed and looked up at the nurse who had retreated to dispose of the used syringe. "Can you escort Buffy back to her room, please?" The nurse nodded silently and gently grasped Buffy's arm helping her to her feet and began leading her out of the office.

Angel watched silently until they disappeared out of his sight. Sighing as guilt curled in his belly for putting that stress on her already fragile mental state… a mental state that was obviously more fragile than he had estimated… Leaning down he picked up his fallen clipboard and looked down at his carefully taken notes. He'd have to find out more about Buffy's dreams… just what exactly happened in them to make her react like that to the idea that it wasn't a past life… that it could be her real life… which he should have known was the conclusion she would immediately jump to… "You're going to need to be more careful, Angel." He muttered to himself as he walked over to his desk where the rest of Buffy's file was lying. Slipping his taken notes into the manila folder he sat heavily down in his desk chair. His eyes glancing at the clock to see how much time he had before his next patient would be appearing in his doorway. He'd have to use the time to compose himself and prepare for them. Something he was sure he would find more difficult than normal with Buffy's melt down on his mind…

Silently Angel promised himself that he would take Buffy's file home with him tonight to look over the entire contents again and analyse all the notes he had taken so far. He didn't want to make another mistake like the one that occurred today.

*****B/A/us***B/A/us*****

Buffy sat up leaning against the headboard of her bed; her legs splayed out in front of her, her arms lying limply at her sides as she stared desolately at the closed, but not locked door of the room that had been assigned to her the moment her parents had signed her into Sunnydale's Asylum; which as far as she knew was the last moment her parents had spent together after their divorce…

The drugs were doing their job in keeping her calm and but it couldn't stop her thoughts turning around and around in her brain and a subdued version of butterflies fluttering about in the small space of her stomach as she silently wished that she could stop thinking if only for a little while.

**A/N:**__I hope that you all enjoyed this chapter. And hopefully I'll have the next one out for you as quickly as I got this one done.


	3. Chapter 2

**CHAPTER 2**

Buffy sat in a couch in a sitting area of the facility she had been locked away in, her sad hazel eyes staring out the window at the dreary grey sky as rain pattered softly against the window. The weather imitating the mood she had been in since she'd left Doctor O'Conner's office yesterday afternoon. The drugs had done their job in calming her, but there was nothing that could stop the raw churning of her mind as it filled with new and disturbing thoughts that didn't make the nausea in her stomach feel any better. Her hands twisted together tightly as her mind continued to churn over her dreams… her memories and what they meant for her if they weren't from a past life as she had first thought…

"So, perhaps I was wrong about you." Faith commented as she flung herself down on the couch opposite Buffy.

Buffy blinked as she came out of her miserable stupor and turned her gaze to the smug… almost excited looking Faith. "Wrong about what?" She asked dully.

Faith leaned forward. "Wrong about you being easily fixable." She murmured with a smirk and a wink.

"So, you heard about my little meltdown already?" Buffy murmured with a depressed sigh.

Faith laughed. "Nothing stays secret here for long. The nurses are worse than those bratty school girls that hang out in those ridiculous cliques in school gossip wise." Faith said with an exaggerated shudder. Buffy looked down with an uncomfortable squirm and Faith spluttered in surprise and choked on a shocked laugh. "You one of those cliquey little bitches?"

Buffy shrugged uncomfortably. "That's what my dreams tell me."

Faith let out a cackle of laughter, drawing the gazes of a few of the patients and nurses for a moment, before they turned back to their own business. "Then your dreams are wrong." She said firmly, drawing a sharp look from Buffy. "You seem far too smart and quiet for that."

Buffy shrugged. "I guess, my priorities changed," She replied with a small shiver. 'All the things I have done… taking pleasure in doing them beside the demon in my memories.' She thought with a cold shiver.

"Don't be so depressed about it." Faith urged mistaking the source of the blond's shiver. "We've all got things in our past that makes us cringe."

"And some of us have a lot." Buffy muttered under her breath as another cold shiver ran down her spine.

"Cheer up Buff, this place isn't so bad. If you can ignore the stifling routine the nurses shove down our throats." Faith muttered with an annoyed look at the nurse that was keeping a keen eye on her.

Before Buffy could muster up a reply, a shadow fell over them and the two women looked up to see a nurse standing before them. "Is it time already?" Buffy asked with a reluctant sigh.

The nurse nodded. "Please come with me." Buffy looked passed the nurse and saw the two security guards standing only a slight distance behind her. She nodded with a sigh and slowly began to stand from the couch.

"Ooh, an armed escort." Faith cooed as she too took in the security guards standing behind the nurse.

Buffy shrugged as she looked back over her shoulder at the still seated brunette. "What can I say, I'm popular." Her small quip, making Faith hoot with laughter as Buffy began moving away heading towards the offices of the shrinks employed by The Sunnydale Mental institute.

*****B/A/us***B/A/us*****

Buffy stepped into Doctor O'Conner's office and immediately her gaze fell to table that had been placed in between the patients chair and the Doctors, a deck of cards set in the middle of the varnished wooden table top. Buffy lifted her gaze to the Doctor. "What's this?" She asked as she moved towards her chair.

"Well, I thought that perhaps we could play cards." Angel offered with what he hoped was a reassuring smile as Buffy sat down.

Buffy frowned considering. "But won't it be hard for you to take notes if we're playing cards?" She asked.

"Oh, I was thinking that perhaps we could take a little break today." Angel explained as he leaned forward and picked up the deck of cards. "Is there any game you prefer?" He asked.

"Well, I like playing Snap and Go Fish, and Old Maid when there's a decent amount of people to make it worthwhile." Buffy murmured in answer to his question.

"Both Snap and Go Fish are doable." Angel said as he began shuffling the cards with an ease that spoke of lots of practise. "Which did you feel like playing?"

"Neither." Buffy rejected his offer with a soft voice. "This is because of what happened yesterday right? I appreciate it, but I'd rather just continue from where I left off yesterday." She muttered as she looked down at her hands.

"Buffy," Angel began as he leaned forward, his hands pausing in the shuffling of the playing cards. "You don't have to push yourself,"

"Yesterday, you said talking about this would help you to get me back out into the real world." Buffy cut him off with a determined frown. "Have you changed your mind?" She asked, a nervous waver entering her voice as she asked the question.

"No, I haven't." Angel assured her. "I just don't want to push you too far too fast."

"I'm stronger than I look." Buffy replied as she curled her feet up onto her chair. "Besides I told you, once I started I wouldn't be able to stop… and… I want to know if I'm crazy or a criminal." Buffy murmured as she twisted her hands together nervously in her lap; rather nervous about the answer she would receive from the Doc by the end of her tale.

Angel almost let the deck of cards slip from between his fingers, before he composed himself. "Buffy, I can assure you that this is all in your head. These memories you say that you have are nothing but dreams… horrible dreams, but dreams all the same."

Buffy shook her head as she chewed gently on her lower lip anxiously, it was such a hard concept for her to accept even after 3 weeks of the Doc telling her so whilst she remained stubbornly silent; refusing to interact in the hopes of being sent home. "I'm really starting to wish that I could believe that." She admitted with a shiver of dread.

Angel sat up straight and set the cards down on the table he had brought in especially for Buffy's session. "That's… That's amazing progress, Buffy!" He exclaimed as he stood and strode towards his desk. "What has you questioning your beliefs all of a sudden?" He enquired as he opened a drawer and pulled out the clipboard from it, opening it to the fresh page that was at the ready for his next patient, not having thought he'd need it for Buffy's session today.

Buffy interlocked her fingers and twisted them harshly as she swallowed thickly. "Because if they are real… and not from a past life like you pointed out yesterday. It means that I'm a horrible person, the kind of horrible that deserves to die in a really horrible kind of way." Buffy murmured seriously.

Angel froze on his way back over to his chair surprised by her words and was once again hit by the fact that something seriously awful must happen in her dreams to make her think such a thing. "Buffy, I can assure you that these are dreams. There will be nothing real about them."

Buffy swallowed thickly as she looked up and met the Doctors eyes. "You promise?" She asked, a large amount of vulnerability entering her voice.

Angel looked at her with sympathy as he seated himself back down in his chair, the vulnerability in her gaze tugging at him. "I promise, Buffy." He swore solemnly.

Buffy was silent for a moment as she processed his answer, really hoping that it was true… for the first time since she started having the vivid dreams she hoped that she really was just losing her mind and that Doctor O'Conner could fix her… make her like she was before she started having them. "Then can we please continue. I really want to get better." Buffy said hopefully, even though she couldn't help but doubt that her dreams weren't real… they were just so damned life like.

Angel nodded as he observed her as she sat nervously before him, her hands still clutched together tightly on her lap and he could understand why. It was a massive step to be able to even admit that a delusion may not be real. He could understand just how nerve racking the idea was for her. It really was a large testament to the strength Buffy possessed to be able to see the possibility even if it was only because the idea of her dreams being a reality had become too horrible to her for her to be able to accept. "Ok." Angel agreed. "But I want you to take it slow. Don't push yourself, understood?"

Buffy gave a small nod of understanding. "Don't worry I'll try my best not to have another meltdown on you." She assured him, before taking a breath to try and steady her somewhat ragged nerves. "I made it safely up into my room without my parents noticing me… and I went to bed that night without having dinner to avoid them. There is always an oppressive air around my parents after a fight and more than likely they'll start to argue again at the slightest provocation… which I hated." Buffy explained as Angel made a small notation on the page, before returning his gaze to her. "Not having had dinner I woke up hungry a few hours later and snuck quietly into the kitchen…"

Buffy quietly moved down the steps avoiding the one that creaked not wanting to wake her parents, neither of whom would be entirely pleased to see her sneaking down for food after refusing to come down for dinner. Making it into the kitchen she turned on the kitchen light and moved quietly to the fridge. Pulling open the door, a smile curved up her lips as she saw a plate of food covered in cling-wrap with a note on top. 'For when you get hungry' printed in her mother's hand. It pleased her to know that despite the argument with her dad, her mom had still thought of her. Taking the plate out of the fridge she nudged the door shut and winced as it slammed against the fridge with a lot more force than she had intended in the supposedly gentle nudge; the contents of the fridge rattling noisily.

Cocking her head, Buffy stilled listening intently for any signs that the noise had woken her parents from their slumber. Her concentration was that intense that she imagined that she could hear the sounds of her parents breathing as easily as if she was standing just outside their bedroom door… which was impossible. Shrugging it off, she turned her attention back to the plate of food that her stomach was grumbling loudly for. Walking over to the microwave she quickly set about heating the food on the plate. Pressing the start button, Buffy turned her gaze up to the cupboard above the microwave, opening it she reached up, going up onto the balls of her feet to do so, she pulled down a glass. Settling back down onto her feet, she moved to set it down so that she could get the bottle of juice from the fridge to go with her meal. But before she could even get the glass half way down the glass shattered in her hand and Buffy gave a cry of surprise as the glass shards spiralled wildly around her.

Buffy's hands shook as she started at the shattered pieces on the bench and floor around her feet. As she continued to stare at the broken glass trying to understand just what had happened, a red drop mingled in with the shards on the table top and was quickly joined by another. Turning over her shaking hand she saw a small shard of glass imbedded in her palm. As soon as she laid eyes on the shard, her blood blossoming up around the edges of the wound it started to throb painfully. With a wince and trembling hand Buffy plucked the shard from her flesh, causing fresh blood to well up in the small thin wound. Looking up from the pooling blood she regarded the broken shards of glass once again, her brow furrowed in confusion as she wondered what had happened. All she'd done was lift the glass down from the cupboard and it seemed to have suddenly burst into pieces out of nowhere!

Buffy turned her gaze back to her hand as the throbbing in her hand lessened and as she watched the small wound seemed to disappear before her eyes. "What the..?" Buffy muttered as her frown deepened in her growing puzzlement. Looking up her gaze landed on the sink and carefully she walked over to it avoiding the visible shards of broken glass, turning on the faucet she placed her injured hand under the running tap the cool water cleaning the wet blood from her hand, hoping that her cleaned hand would reveal the wound that couldn't have just disappeared after only a couple of minutes, even if the wound had been small. Lifting her hand from under the running water, her hazel eyes widened and her heart picked up speed in her chest as she stared at her palm, the trembling fingers of her other hand running over a tiny pink mark where the small cut had been before. "What the hell!" She gasped as she continued to stare at the spot in her shock. Buffy curled her hand into a fist, her frown turning angry as she remembered the stuffy old Englishman and what he had told her in the privacy of his house. _'She alone will have the strength and the skill…'_

Buffy turned her gaze back to the shattered glass, the sound of the microwave beeping filling her ears, but she ignored it as she moved quickly back across the kitchen heading for her bedroom so that she could change back out of her pyjamas. She had a bone to pick with a stuffy old Englishman who had a lot of explaining to do!

Buffy rounded a corner with hurried steps her arms wrapped about her as marched through the dark Los Angeles night, the Rose-Pine Cemetery coming into view. Her lips pursed angrily as her eyes landed on the car that she recognised as Merrick's. As she drew closer the driver's side door opened and Merrick stepped out of the car and turned to face her, having been keeping a look out for her arrival. Buffy stalked up to him, not stopping until she was directly in front of the taller older man, she glared up at him through narrowed eyes. "What did you do to me?!" She demanded to know, her hands clenching into fists at her sides as for the first time in her life she felt the desire to do physical damage to someone. Right now she wanted to punch the smug arrogant looking Merrick right in the nose, wiping his self-assured composed expression right off his face. "Well?!" She prompted impatiently after a short moment when Merrick didn't voice a reply immediately.

"As I tried to tell you before, Ms. Summers, you're The Chosen One. The Slayer." Merrick replied calmly.

"Well, un-choose me!" Buffy demanded angrily. "I just broke a glass from just lifting it from the cupboard… and I got a cut and it healed within minutes!" She exclaimed as she raised her previously injured hand to show him her completely healed palm. "There's got to be like a gazillion other girls out there that are most suited to this destiny stuff."

"I'm afraid, Ms. Summers that that is impossible. Once you have become The Chosen One there is no way to un-choose you as you put it." Merrick explained as he began moving toward the boot of his car, Buffy slowly following him. "The only time a new Slayer is Called is when the previous Slayer dies."

"Dies?" Buffy repeated slowly. "Dies as in dead… as in buried 6feet under dead?"

"The Slayer doesn't get buried. She gets cremated, but yes." Merrick replied as he slid his car key into the lock on his boot.

Buffy swallowed thickly as she tried to process that. "Ok, you see now that's going to be a problem. 'Cause I have a serious aversion to dying." She attempted to quip as she watched Merrick turn the key in the lock.

"That's good." Merrick said seriously as he opened his boot revealing the contents to Buffy's shocked gaze. "A strong desire to live is paramount in surviving for The Slayer."

Buffy took a step back from the open boot, the large array of weapons that had been revealed to her; Swords, knives, a double sided axe, and pointy wooden stakes as well as bottles of water that had a picture of a cross on it. Merrick reached in and pulled out a couple of the stakes from his boot, turning to face Buffy he held one out to her. "Oh no, I don't fight… I've never even thrown a punch before." She tried to excuse, holding her hands up in rejection of the pointed weapon, but Merrick merely grabbed one of her hands and placed the stake in it. "You can't be serious?! I might break a nail." Buffy said seriously as she looked up from her hand that was wrapped around the weapon that felt strange and unfamiliar in the palm of her hand.

Merrick sighed in exasperation and rubbed his forehead with firm fingers, in an attempt to massage away the dull headache that was already starting to form after only a few moments in the vapid blond presence. _'Why me?'_ He thought tiredly. "You'll break more than a nail if you don't change your attitude."

Buffy frowned at Merrick as he shut the boot to his car with a slam, before turning to head into the cemetery. "What's wrong with my attitude?" She called after him, before reluctantly following him into the cemetery.

"It'll get you killed." Merrick stated as they walked through the gates.

"Oh, so suddenly it's a bad thing to not like getting into fights and carrying weird pointy-ended wood weapons." Buffy grumbled dubiously. "I'll have you know that I'm the most popular girl in school. Everyone wants to be my friend, so my attitude has to be doing something right."

"We're not in your safe little schoolyard, Ms. Summers. We're in the real world now and you're going to have grow up fast if you want to live for much longer."

Buffy frowned at the insult, her hand tightening about the stake she was still carrying as they continued to move deeper into the cemetery. "Well, excuse me for being young and popular." She muttered under her breath. "Where are you taking me anyway?" She asked annoyed as she crossed her arms over her chest. "It's creepy in here." She complained.

"Not too much farther." Merrick assured the young Slayer as he walked down a grassy path lined with headstones, his gaze flicking from one to the next reading each name engraved on it before moving on. Until he read the name he had been looking for. "We're here."

Buffy looked from Merrick to the headstone they were now standing in front of. "You took me to visit one of your dead pals?" Buffy asked incredulously. "Is this really the time?"

"No, I've never met this man in my life." Merrick stated.

"Then, why are we," Buffy began.

"What do your senses tell you?" Merrick asked cutting Buffy off.

Buffy frowned at Merrick in confusion. "Senses?" She questioned as she looked back down at the headstone, wondering just what she was supposed to be feeling aside from creeped out about this whole wacky thing. She was holding a stake for heaven's sake!

"Close your eyes," Merrick instructed, Buffy gave him a wary look, but did so with a sigh when Merrick gestured for her to do so. "And focus. Focus on the ground beneath the headstone. Concentrate, allow your instincts to guide you." He instructed.

Buffy frowned, before opening her eyes with a sigh. "My instincts say that this is stupid."

Merrick's gaze turned disappointed. "You don't sense anything?"

"Sorry." She apologised with a shrug, before brightening. "Hey, maybe this means you've got the wrong girl." She suggested happily.

Merrick sighed. "We are going to have to work on your senses." He muttered, Buffy didn't reply as her attention was drawn from the frowning Merrick as out of the corner of her eyes she saw the slightest of movement in the grass before them, her eyes widening in fear as dirt began to rise up out of the ground along with fingers… fingers that were quickly followed by a dirty reaching hand. Buffy yelped and jumped back from the headstone, her free hand clutching to Merrick's arm. "What's happening? Hands aren't supposed to dig themselves out of the ground! Things that are buried are supposed to be dead."

"It's a vampire. Buffy." Merrick said calmly even as he winced at the strong grip she had on his arm. "A fledgling, which should be easy for The Vampire Slayer to dispatch."

"Dispatch as in…" Buffy tore her eyes from what was now two arms flailing about the air as the vampire beneath the ground tried to figure out how to dig the rest of him up from the dirt and released Merrick's arm in horror; much to Merrick's relief, as she stared at him wide eyed. "Wait, you want me to kill it!"

Merrick nodded as he began stepping back to give her more room. "That is The Slayer's duty." He reminded her.

Buffy turned her gaze to the vampire that had now managed to wriggle most of its body out from its grave, fear clutching at her as she took in the awful hard bumpy ridges of the vampire's face and the hungry amber eyes that were locked on her, the fledging's attention drawn by her tempting rapid heartbeat and the scent of her fear. "Oh crap." Buffy muttered to herself as the vampire pulled itself completely free of the ground and growled at her hungrily. Buffy stood frozen as the vampire began stalking towards her, its sharp fangs bared.

From where he stood watching with sharp eyes Merrick watched, his own stake well in hand just in case his demonstration didn't go as he hoped and Ms. Summers needed aid. "Listening to your instincts." He counselled.

"Yeah, great, thanks." Buffy said ungratefully as she watched the advancing vampire and ducked the punch the vampire threw at her head. "Oh, um…" Buffy voiced panicked as she straightened back up.

"Don't panic," Merrick advised as he stood watching. "You know how to defend yourself."

"I told you, I don't fight!" Buffy shouted back agitatedly as she side stepped the vampire's grasping dirty hands.

"It's instinctual."

Buffy frowned darkly. "Look enough with the instinct thing already!" She growled angrily as she ducked under the second punch the vampire threw at her, as she straightened again, the vampire took her by surprise with another punch that managed to hit her square in the face. Buffy let out a grunt as she fell to the ground, the blow not hurting as much as she had expected. The vampire advanced on her and Buffy didn't take the time to think as her leg swept out, catching the vampire by the foot kicking his legs out from under him. Scrambling to her feet she thrust the stake down on instinct the wood piercing the vampire's chest. Rattled Buffy let go of the stake and stood up a little smile curling up her lips at her success… even if it had gotten her clothes dirty.

Merrick came up beside her as the vampire lay gasping on the ground, surprise on its face. "You missed the heart." He observed.

Buffy looked back down at the vampire. "Oh, like I'm supposed to know exactly where the heart is?" Buffy trailed off as she realized what she now had to do. "Oh, uh… so gross" She muttered as bent back down and grasped the stake. "I'm really sorry," She apologised as she made an 'ick' face as she tugged on the stake, easily pulling the sharply pointed wood out from the vampire's chest, before plunging it back down, this time at least nicking the vampire's un-beating heart and this time the vampire gave her a wide eyed look, his face returning to the smoother features of the human in his surprise before crumpling into dust at her feet.

Buffy stared at the spot, dust on her shoes and on the ground in front of her, dust that had once held the shape of a human… a vampire… she felt a warm hand on her shoulder through the cloth of her jacket. "Well done." Merrick praised her. "You did well for your first time."

Buffy swallowed thickly as she saw the man… vampire turn to dust before her eyes once again, making everything Merrick had tried to tell her before all too real. "Just so you know, right now… I hate you." She muttered as she stood, brushing her clothes off with slightly trembling hands… hands that had somehow almost acted on their own as she plunged the stake into the vampire's chest not once, but twice. Buffy shivered… she'd never thought that in a million years she had something like that in her.

Merrick nodded, accepting her words as part of the process. It was never an easy thing to be Called from the simple life you knew that was safe and blissfully ignorant to one where you were suddenly thrust into the middle of a war that had been going on long before you'd been born. "Come, I'll drive you home." He offered. Buffy nodded as she folded her arms about her waist and quietly followed after Merrick a sombre expression on her face, an emotion that wasn't often seen there.

Behind them, detaching himself from the shadows a figure emerged his dark eyes shining with malicious intent as he watched the newly Called Slayer walk away with her Watcher, a smirk curling up his lips.

Merrick pulled up outside the Summers family home and turned his gaze to the girl that had been oddly silent the entire drive. "Meet me at my house after you've finished school tomorrow. There are things we must go over." Buffy reluctantly met his gaze, before nodding sombrely in acceptance. Opening the door, Buffy stepped out of the car and began making her way towards the dark house. Merrick watched her go for a long moment, up until she made it to her front door, before he took off down the road. Buffy looked back at the sound of the car driving down the road, sighing heavily she turned away and opened the door as quietly as she could and stepped into the house.

*****B/A/us***B/A/us*****

Buffy blinked and gave herself a small shake as she pulled herself out of the moment and looked at Doctor O'Conner who was gazing at her with a soft look in his eyes as if he had been taken in by the emotions she had been experiencing in that moment to. "I went back into the kitchen and turned the light on. After killing that fledge I wasn't feeling hungry… in fact I was feeling rather sick to my stomach so I scrapped the food I'd heated up into the bin and hoped that mom wouldn't check the bin. I also cleaned up the broken glass and drops of blood, not wanting my mom or dad to ask questions about it if they found it." Buffy swallowed and took a breath. "And that's pretty much where my first memory ended."

Angel placed his pen down on the clipboard as he silently processed the last of the details for a moment. "And how did you feel when you woke up?" He asked.

Buffy frowned as she tried to remember the moment she had woken up after her first experience. "Um… Well I woke up pretty sweaty and scared… but I shrugged it off as a dream and didn't think about it again until the next one came the next night."

Angel nodded and picked up his pen to make a quick last note on the page. "Ok, Buffy. Thank you."

Buffy looked at him in surprise. "Why the gratitude?" She asked.

Angel gave her a smile, showing off his teeth. "Because I'm grateful that you're finally trusting me, and because it's very brave of you to want help." He told her truthfully.

Buffy stared at him quietly for a moment, before she gifted him with a small smile and shrugged. "Well, if you say so. Thanks I guess." She glanced over at the time, before returning her gaze to Angel. "Am I right to go for the day?" She asked hopefully needing a break.

Angel glanced at the time as well, before nodding his agreement. "Yeah, go ahead Buffy. I'll see you tomorrow."

Buffy nodded and stood from her chair. "Thanks, Doctor O'Conner." She murmured, before turning and walking to the door without a backwards glance at Angel who was watching her as she left through the door. Angel sighed and turned his gaze down to the fresh notes he had taken as she had gone over the last parts of her first dream for him; he could only imagine what it must be like to kill someone… even if it was in a dream. _'I will help you get through this, Buffy.'_ He thought determinedly as he got up to put the newly taken notes with the rest of her file that was once again safely tucked away in his filing cabinet.


	4. Chapter 3

**Disclaimer:**__I don't own Buffy the Vampire Slayer or any of the characters mentioned in the cannon.

**A/N:** A huge thank you to everyone who took the time to read and review last chapter, I know I've been slack with getting out review replies, but RL has been busy and I thought you would appreciate it more if I used the spare time I've had to complete a chapter instead. I hope that you all enjoy this chapter as much as the previous ones. Happy reading.

**CHAPTER 3**

Buffy sat silently on the couch that she had gotten used to over the past three and a bit weeks whilst Angel finished some of the morning paperwork he hadn't managed to get done before her rearranged appointment time. She was glad for the chance to just sit in silence and rest for a bit longer, her eyes and mind still sluggish from sleep having only woken up a few minutes ago. One of the friendly neighbourhood nurses on her ward having prodded her awake to inform her that her appointment time had been changed and that she needed to get up now so that she could make it on time. Stifling what she believed would have been a wide noisy yawn as she allowed her eyes to close for a moment and she shifted in the chair, curling her legs up onto the couch for comfort and warmth as the office slowly warmed up and for a moment she idly thought of getting up to stand in front of the heater that was blowing out enticingly warm air, before deciding against it as sleepy as she was, she would fall asleep in front of it. Opening her eyes again as she heard the soft sound of the manila folder closing over the paperwork he'd been completing.

"Sorry about that." Angel apologised as he pulled his notepad and clipboard out from under the folder he had been working in. "The paperwork took longer than I anticipated." He said in explanation as he fiddled with the clipboard for a moment, getting everything ready for when they started their session.

Buffy shrugged her shoulders as she stifled another yawn and gave her head a small shake in an attempt to wake herself up a bit more. "It's s'ok." She slurred out through the tail end of the yawn that she was half covering with her hand, not having been able to fully squash the yawn. "I should warn you though. I'm a complete horror to deal with before I've been able to have my morning coffee." She warned with the tiniest hint of a smile curling up her lips.

"Is that a subtle way of telling me that you're not happy with being gotten up so early?" Angel asked with a small smile of his own.

Buffy shrugged. "More a 'if you have to get me up at such an ungodly hour you could at least accompany it with a hot coffee… or a hot chocolate' either would work really."

"8:30 is ungodly?" Angel asked amused.

"It is when you're used to being able to sleep until 9:30, 10 if I'm lucky." Buffy replied, before hiding another yawn behind her hand. "It'd put me in a better mood at any rate."

"So, it would be like a bribe?"

"What do you mean 'like'?" Buffy said with a smirk. "But you can refer to it as an apology if it makes you feel any better." She added teasingly.

"I'll remember that, but for today you'll just have to make do with a verbal apology. I have an appointment today which is why I've had to squeeze you in this morning." Angel explained. "Rest assured that tomorrow you will go back to being after lunch."

"You mean I could have had a day off from being poked and prodded at and you decided to drag me out of bed instead… that's just cruel." Buffy muttered with a small pout as she crossed her arms over her chest.

Angel gazed at Buffy with consideration for a short moment. "Perhaps I should schedule all your appointments with me for this time in the morning. Being tired seems to have loosened your tongue. I think I'm actually seeing the real Buffy for the first time."

Buffy's eyes widened and she stared at him in disbelief, hoping to see some sign that he was joking. "Ok, I take it back its inconvenient, but that, that would be cruel. As a Doctor you should know that a girl needs her beauty sleep, even in an insane asylum."

Angel kept his serious face for a moment longer, before he couldn't help but break out into the smile that he had been fighting to keep at bay from the moment he had gotten her reaction, not a second after he smiled Angel chuckled. "You can relax, Buffy. I'm not keen for so many early mornings either." He reassured her.

Buffy sighed out a breath of relief and relaxed into the chair, grateful that the threat of early mornings for the rest of her stay here had been removed. "Ok, perhaps we should get on with it. I seem to be digging myself into a hole with my cranky pre-coffee talk."

"This is you cranky?" Angel asked a little surprised, he hadn't thought that she was being disagreeable in anyway.

"Mildly." Buffy murmured with a small shrug as she shifted on her couch as the office started to really warm to a more comfortable temperature. "Do you want to talk about my cranky metre or about what happened next?" She asked with a questioning eyebrow.

Angel cleared his throat as he focused his mind from idle conversation to the task at hand. "Of course." He agreed as he posed his pen over the fresh page of the notepad. "Just whenever you're ready, Buffy." He encouraged softly, his gaze focusing on her as he waited.

Buffy nodded as she shifted once again on the couch, bringing her leg back down so that her feet could rest against the carpeted floor. "It was the next day and I'd just had one of the worst days I had ever had in school. In fact I'd go so far as to say that it was the worst day I'd ever had during school hours…"

Buffy walked out of the school building and began making her way to the stairs that lead towards the school gates where cars were pulling in and out as they waited for and picked up their children. Her group of friends filing out the door behind her and swiftly moved to surround her once again. "I can't believe how much of a major klutz you were today, Buffy." Her friend Veronica spoke up breaking the small lull in conversation they'd had whilst walking through the door.

"V, that is so mean!" Sophia gasped from the other side of Buffy.

Veronica rolled her eyes. "Oh please, Soph. I wasn't being mean. I was just saying that she's been clumsy all day. Everyone has days like that. I remember one day just walking down the hall to daddy's office and just as I walked past my Gucci handbag like totally knocked a thousand dollar antique vase off a pedestal. It had my mother crying. Apparently it was some kind of family heirloom or something. But anyway what I was trying to say is that everyone has klutz attacks. And I'm that blue ink will come out of your sweater." Veronica tacked on, an uncertain expression on her face as she eyed the dark blue stain on the sweater Buffy was wearing, one that she had done her best to cover with her fashionable silver scarf.

Buffy glanced down at the stain to a frown darkening her brow as she stared at the offending colour marring her otherwise perfectly trendy sweater. Remembering how easily and suddenly the blue biro pen had just snapped between her fingers in the middle of class much to her mortification. Of course that hadn't been the only accident she had had that day. She'd accidentally broken her locker door just by trying to pull it open when the lock had stuck as it sometimes did and the next thing she knew the locker door had come free of the locker with a small screeching sound that had drawn everyone's attention and then there had been that disaster in the bathroom when she'd gone to try and clean herself up after her ink spillage… the handle to the cold water tap had come right off in her hand! Luckily no one had been around to see that one. It would have been hard to explain away how she'd managed to do that one. Needless to say she'd fled the scene of the crime in a hurry leaving the water running for someone else to find and deal with. "Uh yeah. It was probably something I ate last night before bed." Buffy said lamely as she looked back up from the stain on her sweater, shifting scarf self-consciously once again in an attempt to better hide the stain from view.

"Ooh! I've heard about that!" Victoria exclaimed as they reached the stairs that would lead down to the front of the school. "Some food having adverse effects if you eat them just before bed."

Sophia wrinkled her nose in concern. "Oh, what did you eat Buffy?" She asked curiously.

Buffy shrugged to by herself some time to think of something as truth be told she hadn't eaten anything, having been to frazzled from the events of the night. "Uh, just some crackers with cheese." She made up.

"Crackers and cheese?" Veronica and Sophia spoke together, their voices doubtful that something so plain would cause clumsiness the next day.

"Well, yeah… I mean… now that I think about it the cheese might have tasted a little funny." Buffy explained away and both girls nodded whilst the three other members of the group nodded and twittered about it amongst themselves, ohing and ahing over how they weren't going to eat crackers and cheese before bed anytime soon and wondering if the cheese had started to go off if it had tasted funny. One even suggested that perhaps it had been injected with some kind of drug.

"So, does this mean that you're going on some kind of diet?" Sophia asked Buffy. "Because if you are I am. I could do with losing a couple more pounds."

Veronica rolled her eyes and snorted a little. "You could lose 10 pounds and still not be able to get a boyfriend." She said cattily.

Sophia gasped hurt, before scowling at her friend. "You can be such a bitch sometimes V!" She growled.

Veronica smiled at her widely flashing her pearly white teeth. "That's why you love me." Sophia rolled her eyes, but before she could say anything Buffy broke in to defuse the tension between the two.

"No, I'm not going on a diet." She said loud enough to draw Veronica's and Sophia's attention back to her. "I was just a little hungry before bed is all." She explained with another shrug.

"Oh well good. Cause I hate going on diets." Sophia said, quickly changing her tune. "And you look great, Buffy! There's no way that you need one." She covered herself scared to anger the blond who had the power to kick her out of the group that she had worked so hard to get into in the first place. "Right girls?" She asked of the three behind them and Veronica. Immediately the three girls behind them hurried to agree, gushing over how good Buffy looked and how much they wished that they could be more like her.

Veronica rolled her eyes at the babbling trio behind them and gently touched Buffy's shoulder. "You look great. Ink stain non withstanding." She told Buffy.

Buffy smiled at Veronica and moved to say something in response when she caught sight of a car she had seen only twice before and yet would recognise it anywhere as it parked out the front of the gate. One of her hands came up to grab the rim of her sunglasses and carefully pulled them down from her face, not wanting to break them to today. "Oh my God! What's he doing here?!" She said in a loud mutter before realizing that she probably shouldn't have spoken aloud.

"What is it, Buffy? And who does that car belong to?" Veronica asked. "It's a total bomb. I wouldn't be caught dead in that poor excuse for a trash heap on wheels." She scathed aloofly.

"Do you know that old guy, Buffy?" Sophia asked as she observed the car and the man inside of it.

Buffy frowned down at the car from where she stood frozen halfway down the steps. "I don't believe this!" She muttered under her breath. "I have to go you guys, but I'll see you all tomorrow before classes."

"Yeah, bye Buffy." The group called after the blond as she hurriedly descended the stairs, a decided agitation to her steps.

Sophia leaned in closer to Veronica. "Who do you think he is?" She asked quietly as Buffy reached the car that normally none of them would be even caught dead near.

Veronica shrugged as she watched Buffy open the passenger door of the car. "No clue, but I can tell you that no reason in the world could get me to sit my ass in that sad excuse for a hunk of junk." She murmured, before turning her nose up at the car and began descending the stairs, Sophia hurrying after and the three others trailing behind them as they talked mostly among themselves. Theirs ears always pricked for any sign that Veronica or Sophia were talking to them.

Buffy manoeuvred herself into the vehicle and slammed the door shut behind her a dark scowl furrowing her brow as she glared at Merrick who had yet to even bother to look at her. "You can never do this again, do you understand? I can't have you continuously rocking up to my school, especially not the front gates of my school in this I can hardly even bear to call it a car. I have a reputation to uphold and friends to impress. I can't be seen getting into this 'car'."

"Oh, do please forgive me." Merrick apologised with sarcasm dripping from his voice. "Do try to understand Buffy that I, you have much bigger concerns than what your friends and the rest of the student body thinks of you." He scolded lightly, his tone no less serious than if he had been loudly reprimanding her for her selfishness.

Buffy looked down at her lap a little shamefaced and picked idly at the fingers of one hand with the other as the car pulled out into the flowing traffic and took off down the road. There was silence between them for a long moment before Buffy spoke again. "Sorry." She apologised softly. it was hard for her to truly wrap her head around the full concept that she had bigger things to worry about now, despite all the accidents today and the events of last night; even just thinking about what the stuffy English guy beside her wanted of her was enough to make her break out into an icky sweat.

Merrick glanced over at Buffy for the first time since she'd gotten into the car. "It's ok, Buffy. I understand that this will take some getting used to on your part. Trust me when I say that one day soon this will be like second nature to you." He attempted to reassure her.

Buffy looked out the window a sad look in her hazel eyes 'what if I don't want this to be second nature' she mouthed at her reflection in the passenger side window.

Buffy threw the knife at the straw stuffed dummy that was standing erect on a stand in the middle of the room that Merrick simply called the training room; a room she had promptly dubbed 'the torture room' quickly after Merrick had started her training. Doing her best to aim the small blade he had given her she threw it once again at the dummy that was already riddled with holes from previous attempts. "Yes!" She cried elated at once again hitting the mark that was panted on the dummies chest or close enough to it that she considered it a win anyway. "Very good, Buffy." Merrick commented with an approving nod making Buffy smile at earning approval from the man that had spent most of his time today frowning at her and correcting her. "You're still holding blade wrong." Merrick corrected making Buffy's smile falter and fade away completely as she sighed in annoyance as she watched him walk over to the dummy and pull out the blade and move back towards her. "You need to hold it with more confidence, Buffy. It's not going to bite you if you hold it with a firm grasp."

Buffy pouted. "What's wrong with the way I'm holding it? It's working just fine to hit the dummies straw heart." She grumbled as she waved a hand towards the dummy, indicating all the wounds she had inflicted upon it.

"You are getting better." Merrick assured her. "But you're not going to always be able to throw the stake or blade at a demon to kill it and in close combat if you're holding the blade like it's a poisonous bug that's about to bite you it'll be turned against you in a moment."

Buffy nibbled on her lower lip as she watched Merrick as he repositioned her fingers along the hilt of the small silver blade. "It feels so uncomfortable and strange." She murmured as Merrick released her hand, for such a small blade it was weighty and even looking at it whilst it was in her hand, knowing what she was expected to do with it sent a tremor of fear through her.

"You'll get used to it." Merrick informed her as he turned away from her. Buffy looked down at the blade again and let out a heavy sigh as she took in the way her impeccably shaped and polished nails looked against the harsh metal. "You will need to go out tonight." Merrick informed her, a stake in his hand. "This should be sufficient for you. I don't expect you to run into anything serious, just few run of the mill vampires, but take the silver knife with you just in case."

Buffy stared up at him wide eyed. "You mean like… patrol? By myself?" She asked, hoping that she had heard him wrong.

"That is part of your duty, Buffy. Protecting people from the creatures of darkness is perhaps what you might call a key aspect of your duty." Merrick informed her once again.

Buffy hesitantly took the stake Merrick was offering her, a worried frown creasing her brow. "I thought… don't I have to graduate from my Staying Learners card before being allowed unsupervised slayage?" She asked, whilst trying to cover how uncertain she felt with a quip.

Merrick sighed and crossed his arms over his chest as he regarded his charge. "Buffy as a Watcher I am here to train and guide you through this and help you as much as I can, but I cannot hold your hand. Slaying is something The Slayer does on her own." Buffy looked down at her feet as she swallowed nervously. "Now if I thought that there was some big evil underfoot I would certainly be a bit more cautious. Trust me when I say that you have all the skills you need for run of the mill demons." Merrick uncrossed his arms. "The first kill is always the hardest, after that it gets easier."

Buffy raised her head and reluctantly nodded. "If you say so." She murmured, still uncertain, but who else could she possibly trust in this situation… no one else knew, no one else was allowed to know. So, she had to trust that he knew what he was doing.

"I should get you home." Merrick said after a moment of silence had passed and the matter seemed closed. Buffy nodded her agreement, if she stayed much later she'd be late for dinner and then she would never hear the end of it.

Buffy sat at the dinner table, her mother and father sitting across from her as she slowly picked her way through the succulent looking roast pork and roasted vegetables her mother had cooked, her stomach in anxious knots as she couldn't help but worry about what she had to do later and the tension in the air that was coming from her parents obvious silence at the dinner table. It had become very obvious the moment she had walked into the house that her parents had had another of their arguments. Stabbing a small portion of one of her slices of roasted pumpkin Buffy popped it into her mouth and began chewing slowly, her gaze angled carefully towards her dinner in an effort to ignore the thick tension between her parents. The tension was so thick that Buffy almost jumped out of her chair when her mother broke the silence. "What happened to your sweater, Buffy?" She asked.

Buffy risked looking up from her plate, to meet her mother's gaze. "Uh, a small argument with my blue biro during class."

"Oh, I see." Joyce murmured, before clearing her throat. "And how was school today?"

Buffy returned her gaze to her mother once again, but couldn't help but see the annoyance in her father's face as glanced over at her mother, before taking another bite of his meal. "It was just school. No big." She said with a shrug, hoping that that would be an end to the strained conversation.

"And how are your friends?" Joyce continued, and this time Hank clanked his knife against the plate loudly in an expression of his annoyance in his still simmering temper.

Buffy glanced nervously over at her father, before focusing her gaze back on her mother. "There good, thanks mom." She murmured quickly, before turning her eyes back to her food once again and began eating faster, sensing that another argument was about to break out at any moment. And when it did she wanted to be out of the line of fire.

*****B/A/us***B/A/us*****

"Are you alright?" Buffy asked breaking off from what she had been saying.

Angel blinked and shifted in his chair at Buffy's question. "I'm fine." He replied curiously. "Why do you ask?"

Buffy shrugged as she leaned back against the back of the couch. "You weren't all Jo-Questions like you normally are." She responded.

"I was caught up in the telling." Angel admitted. "You would make a great story teller Buffy." He told her kindly, meaning it as a complement.

Buffy frowned and shifted uncomfortably on the padded seat of the couch. "This isn't a story to me." She muttered.

"I didn't mean it like that." Angel hurried to correct himself he hadn't meant to sound like he was making light of what plagued her dreams.

Buffy gave her head a shake and smiled at Angel reassuringly. "I know, I was just being overly sensitive." She said as she waved a hand dismissively through the air. Angel let out a breath of relief and nodded his head, before Buffy continued. "It didn't take me long to finish dinner after that, and after dumping my plates in the sink I hurried up the stairs and out of sight afraid that a fight would break out before I could make my getaway…"

Buffy closed the door to her room as quietly as possible not wanting to aggravate the situation down stairs. Deliberately ignoring her school bag as she began walking across her room, her hands coming up to relieve her of the stained sweater, not wanting to have to deal with what was inside the bag until she absolutely had to. Tossing her sweater in the basket that she had to take down to the laundry, she sat down in front of her vanity. For a moment all she did was stare at her reflection, taking in how she looked, everything still looked good; like it was supposed to, except that to her eyes she looked a little pale under the sun kissed tan of her skin. Lifting her hands up to her head she began taking down her hair so that it fell down about her shoulders freely. Pulling out the last pin that had been helping to keep her hair in place, Buffy placed it down with the others, before she picked up her brush and began running it through her hair to help soothe her nerves and distract herself from them.

She had never been the type to suffer from nerves, she was outgoing and confident, but this was completely out of her comfort zone. She was a pacifist! She wasn't used to fighting! But the physical practise hadn't been so bad, in fact the safety of Merrick's 'training room' it had actually felt good to exert herself as she went through the manoeuvres Merrick guided her through to get warmed up and them it was a matter of simply following his instructions as she punched and kicked thick padded gloves he had donned for her to practice with without hurting him too much. There had been a bit of hand shaking on Merrick's part as if he was trying to shake away the pain or after pain tingle from his hands which hadn't failed to bring an upward curve to Buffy's lips. Never before had she felt such satisfaction over something and she had no idea why it had made her feel that way, maybe it was because it was something different, something she had never done before and she had been doing well enough to make him have to shake his hands despite the padding on them.

Buffy was drawn from her thoughts by the sound of her parents raised angry voices and she sighed and squeezed her eyes shut, her hand with the brush stilling in mid motion. Her hand tightened around the handle of her brush only to almost drop it as she heard and felt the handle begin to crack. Pulling the brush from her hair she examined the brush an exasperated sigh escaping past her lips as she took in the cracks along the handle. "Super strength isn't really all it's cracked up to be." She grumbled under her breath. "How come all the movies don't say how annoying it is." Quickly running the brush through the rest of her hair, before placing the brush carefully back down on the desk of her vanity, not wanting to break anything else. Getting up from the vanity, Buffy continued to ignore her book bag as she crossed her room once again. She picked up Mr. Gordo from her bed, before she sat down on the edge of it, her fingers stroking over the stuffed soft toys pink fur, her gaze glancing over to the digital alarm clock that was set up beside her bed on the nightstand. "I'll be alright, right?" She asked the soft toy pig her nervousness clear to see and hear. "Merrick said so."

Buffy let out a wavering breath as she lay back against the mattress, bringing her favourite well cared for childhood toy with her, finding comfort in its familiarity as her mind continued to tick over everything that had happened since yesterday afternoon. _'It doesn't even really seem like it could be real.'_ Buffy thought as she brought her hand up so that it was hovering over her face. She might have believed that it had all been some kind of weird dream except that she kept breaking things… things that she wouldn't normally be able to break by just holding them to tightly or picking them up carelessly. Swiftly sitting up with a smooth motion, she set Mr. Gordo down on the bed, unable to sit still any longer she finally turned her attention to her book bag unable to ignore it any longer. Walking over to it she flipped over the flap and stared down into the already unzipped bag, reaching in she pulled out the stake Merrick had given her and stared at it with a sombre expression as she adjusted her fingers along the base trying to make the feel of it more natural, but even when she arranged her fingers in the way Merrick had shown it still felt odd in her palm… or maybe it was because she was staring at it in her hand, because there was some small part of her that felt almost like she recognised it… but that was impossible, she'd only ever seen one in person yesterday.

Buffy gave her head a shake as she reached into the bag again and carefully pulled out the sheathed dagger. Placing the stake on her lap she began to unsheathe the blade to look at the sharp edges that ended in that dangerously sharp point. She only managed to get it half way unsheathed when she heard her name being called. "Buffy come help me with the dishes!"

Buffy froze like she had just been caught with her hand in the cookie jar, she turned her head towards the door, her eyes wide before she allowed herself to take a breath and re-sheath the dagger. "Coming mom!" She called back as she hurriedly placed the dagger and stake back in her book bag and flicked back over the flap and made her way gladly back towards the kitchen; the sounds of her parents loud angry voices having quieted down to nothing. More than happy for the distraction even if it was just washing or drying the dishes with her mother, it was far better than sitting up here from now until she had to sneak out to go on her first patrol.

*****B/A/us***B/A/us*****

Buffy paused in her telling her eyes on the pen as Angel moved it across the page. She waited for him to finish, before she quietly cleared her throat and continued on. "The next couple of moments kind of had this weird montage like thing going on." She explained. "I did the dishes with mom and I know that we continued to talk about our days. Mom doing everything she could to avoid talking about dad and me doing everything possible to talk about my weird accidents whilst concentrating on not breaking any of the dishes I was drying, but it was rushed kind of like it was skimmed over."

Angel nodded and made another small notation before turning over the page. "Do you have any idea why?" He asked as he shifted slightly in his chair, his eyes meeting Buffy's.

Buffy shrugged as she shifted against the back of the chair, scratching a sudden itch that appeared between her shoulder blades. "Not really. But if I had to hazard a guess," She murmured a little uncertainly. "I'd say that it could be because it had nothing to do with what they're really about."

"What they're really about?" Angel asked as he wheedled for more information.

Buffy smirked very slightly. "We're only on the build-up Doc. The good stuff hasn't started yet." She said a little sardonically.

Angel couldn't help the small twitch of his lips that he quickly supressed. "And when does the good stuff start?"

Buffy glanced away from Angel a little uncomfortably gathering herself for a small moment, before returning her gaze to him. "Soon." She assured him. _'Very soon.'_ She added in her mind, before sighing deeply.

"Would you like a drink of water?" Angel offered after a moment's silence.

"Uh, yeah that'd be nice." Buffy murmured and watched as he got up and walked over to the water dispenser. She continued to watch as he grabbed a foam cup and filled it with water. Buffy averted her gaze when Angel turned around, the large water container glugging loudly. "Thanks." Buffy murmured as she accepted the foam cup from Angel and took a sip of the cool liquid wishing that it was coffee.

"You're welcome." Angel replied as he sat back down.

Buffy took another swallow of her water as she once again leaned back against the back of the chair. "After I finished the dishes with my mom, I made my excuses and disappeared back into my bedroom…"

Buffy chewed on her lower lip as she surveyed the inside of her wardrobe, wondering what she could possibly wear for her first patrol. _'Should this really be so hard?'_ She thought with a mild amount of irritation. Buffy reached into her wardrobe after a long moment and pulled out a thin jacket that would do the job of keeping her bare arms protected from the cooling breeze. Slipping it on she did up a couple of the buttons, before looking at herself in the full length mirror that was on the inside of her wardrobe. A frown darkening her brow, she looked good there was no doubt about that, but to her it didn't seem like an outfit one would wear to go out and fight creepy things that were only supposed to exist in books and scary movies.

Moving from in front of her mirror she went back to her book bag, flipping over the flap once again she reached in and pulled out the weapons Merrick had given her, before moving back in front of the mirror. Looking at her reflection once again, she shook her head as she took in the way she looked with the weapons in her hands. "Oh, this so isn't me!" She whined under her breath as she scowled at her reflection. Sighing despondently she moved awkwardly to hide the weapons on her person like Merrick had told her to. She fumbled awkwardly for a few moments as she tried and tried again to hide them properly. Finally hiding them successfully, she took in her reflection once again, her eyes honing in on where she had hidden the weapons, smoothing her hands over them she couldn't help, but think that they were easily visible under her clothes. But Merrick had told her many times that that wouldn't be the case if she hide them like he had told her to, but still the small bulges they made in her clothes looked odd and completely obvious to her.

Looking at herself for a moment longer, trying to give herself a confidence boost, before she forced herself to turn away and begin making the last of her preparations to leave. Stuffing her pillows under the blankets and arranging them to look roughly like a human lump under the covers. Taking a step back to observe her handiwork she nodded in satisfaction that it would fool either of her parents if they just peeked into the room to check on her before she returned. Flicking off the light, plunging the room into darkness, she blinked in surprise at just how easily she could still see. It was kind of creepy… all the new things that she could do, her strength, her eyes and her ears. It was like that whatever Merrick and his Watcher buddies had done to her had completely changed her. Buffy shook her head and scowled at herself even as the worry gnawed at her. _'No, I'm still me. There is no way that this has changed who I am… I'm still me.'_ She told herself again, trying to think the words firmly, but even in her mind the words sounded shaky and uncertain in her head.

Hugging herself for a moment as she stood undecided on whether she should or even could really go through with this. This was nothing like her, she didn't do this. She was a popular cheerleader. She gave footballers pep before and during the game and spent most of her time with her friends and talking about fashion and boys and hot actors or models. She wasn't a fighter… Buffy stood like that for a long moment, before she slowly let her arms fall to her sides and she began walking towards the window, her expression still uncertain, but there was something inside of her that refused to let her just sit up here in the safety of her room like she had been contemplating. Coming to a stop in front of it, she pushed the window open, making sure that the opening was wide enough for her to be able to squeeze through. Shimming her way out onto the sloping roof, she carefully began moving down it and towards the tree that was close to her bedroom window, but not quiet in front of it. Something that she found seriously annoying at this point as it made her have to carefully move across the roof a small ways in order to get to the branches that were nearest the roof.

Reaching the tree, Buffy forced herself to move into a standing position, stretching one of her arms up so that she could take hold of the branch that was hanging up above her head. She took a nervous breath and swallowed thickly as she tried to build up the courage to swing herself from the roof to the large branch that she could see, using the branch she was clutching as leverage to steady herself during the process. She stood like that for an extended moment, her knees shaking just a little at the idea of having to do the small jump from the roof to the tree branch. In the next moment however her knees suddenly stopped shaking and a firm resolve seemed to fortify her against her fears and with a quick mostly smooth movement she jumped from the roof and landed on the branch that she had been staring at so intently in the moments leading up to the manoeuvre she had just pulled.

Buffy stood how she had landed for a shocked moment before she awkwardly turned a little so that she could look back up at the roof she had just been standing on, her eyes wide as her blood rushed through her veins in what could have been excitement or nerves… she was more inclined to think that it was nerves. "Ok, where in the hell did that come from?" She muttered under her breath, before she forced herself to turn away from the roof and turn her attention to making her way down the branch towards the thick tree trunk so that she could begin the climb down to the much safer solid ground. After long moments of manoeuvring her way down the branches, Buffy finally made it to the solid ground outside of her house, the grass feeling soft and squishy under the soles of her shoes. "Well, that wasn't so bad." She murmured, trying to find the bright side of the experience so far.

Buffy looked down at her hands to examine their shaking and condition after being in contact with something as rough as the bark of the tree beside her family home and she frowned down at them as her eyes zeroed in on the nail of her index finger to see it broken, ruining the look of her previously perfectly manicured fingers. "Already!" She grumbled. "I knew that this would be bad for the health of my hands." She whined a little bitterly, but for some reason it didn't work her up the way it would have done before. She was annoyed about her broken nail, but it was like she didn't consider it as important as she would have just the other day. Shrugging it off Buffy began walking away from her house as she began thinking about places that a vampire or a demon might like to hang out. Buffy ran a hand through her hair as she frowned. _'How the hell am I supposed to know that?'_ She wondered, Merrick hadn't really told her much; just that she should go out and look.

Buffy grunted as she took a heavy hit to her face which sent her to the ground, Buffy gave her head a shake as she regained her senses. She let out a surprised cry as a strong hand wrapped around her ankle and began dragging her across the grass. "Ooh! This isn't good for my clothes. The grass stains are going to murder them." She groused mournfully. Grabbing hold of a tombstone as she was dragged passed it, she used the moment of stillness it gave her as the vampire who had been dragging her to kick as powerfully as she could and was rewarded with the feel of his hand releasing her ankle. Scrambling back up to her feet, Buffy quickly scanned for the vampire she had begun fighting a few moments after she'd begun patrolling the very same cemetery she had been in last night. Her eyes almost immediately found him, her blood rushing through her veins as adrenaline had her body on high alert and instinct for the most part had her raising her arm to block a kick that was aimed at her side, before throwing a punch of her own and felt a wave of satisfaction sweep through her as her closed fist made contact with the hard ridge of the vampire's cheek bone.

Buffy made sounds of exertion in the back of her throat as she traded blows with the vampire, her body reacting on the very basic instinct to survive as well as an instinct that she had never felt before and could even begin to accurately describe the feeling as she began to do more than just block blows and do her best to throw her own. She began to improvise a little, throwing in things that the vampire wasn't expecting as she got into the rhythm of the fight. In a gap, Buffy reached for her stake and pulled it from its hiding place, the smooth wood in her hand making her feel powerful in that moment. Ducked a wide swing of his arm, she stepped in closer and raised her stake arm and with a quick motion that was more jerky than smooth she thrust the stake into his heart, her eyes squeezing shut as she felt the sharp point break through the rib cage and move past protective muscle, before it pierced the un-beating organ that was her target.

The vampire looked down at his chest before looking back up at Buffy as she released the stake and took a step back suddenly feeling unsure and uncomfortable now that the fight was over. "Slayer!" He growled with a sneer, before he crumpled into dust in front of her.

Buffy looked down at the pile of dust that was at her feet and her eyes widened as she realized that he had taken her stake with him. "Damn, forgot I was supposed to pull the stupid thing out, before they go dust." She muttered as a soft breeze started to blow the pile, scattering it into particles of practically nothing. Turning her gaze away from the disappearing pile, she looked down at her rumbled clothes and pouted, before she began trying to straighten herself out. Angling her head back she did her best to see the damage done to the back of her jacket and winced at the large grass stain. "I hope mom can get that out." She muttered, giving her clothes a last pat down and raising her hands to her hair to flatten out any possible fly away locks of hair that had been knocked out of place during the fight, before she turned to begin picking her way back through the cemetery, with her stake gone there was no point in staying out here any longer, her dagger after all wouldn't do much to protect her from a vampire.

Buffy got half way back across the cemetery, the large ornate gates in sight, when she felt a prickly sensation over the back of her neck. the kind of prickly feeling that let you know that you were being watched by an unknown someone when you had assumed that you were alone. Buffy swallowed thickly as she paused in her stride, her mind whirling over what she could possibly do if it was a vampire whilst her heart began an uncomfortable rhythm in her chest. "Well, what do we have here?" A deep male voice caressed her ears that had a shiver of the warm sultry kind running down her spine. It was the kind of voice that just let you know that the owner was going to be hot. _'Please don't be a vampire?'_ Buffy mentally pleaded as she remained still, not wanting to turn and face the owner of the sultry voice in case he was one of the bumpy faced vampire's that wanted to kill her now that she had become The Slayer. "A baby Slayer, all out on her own."

Buffy shivered again this time in fear, only a vampire or demon would call her 'Slayer' and in a cemetery it was going to be a vampire… at least that was what the movies told her.

Buffy swallowed thickly and slowly angled herself so that she could face the vampire that was sitting on what looked to be a stone tomb and as she took him in for the first time, his face free of the hard bumpy ridges that vampire's seemed to wear in her presence, she couldn't help appreciate just how darkly handsome he was in what she could see of the leather and silk he was wearing as he sat, looking for all the world like he was just pausing on a late night stroll through a park and was enjoying the view as he stared at her unblinkingly, an air of confidence about him, something that she really didn't have in this moment, she felt vulnerable and entirely alone and a sinking feeling dropped out the bottom of her stomach as she couldn't help, but think that she was about to die…

*****B/A/us***B/A/us*****

"What did this man… vampire," Angel corrected himself. "Look like?" He asked curiously, his pen ready to take notes on newcomer's description. The way Buffy's demeanour had changed convincing him that this newcomer was an important person in the alternate reality her brain had created for her.

Buffy pulled herself out of the memory she had been recounting for the Doc at his question and she couldn't help the sardonic smile that curled up her lips ever so slightly as she met his curious gaze. "Looked in the mirror lately?" She asked pointedly.

**A/N:** Yes I know an evil cliff-hanger, how evil of me, but I really felt this was the best point to stop for now. As always I shall try and get the next chapter out for you all as soon as possible, even faster this time seeing as there is an evil cliffy. Please feel free to tell me what you think of the chapter :)


	5. Chapter 4

**Disclaimer:** I don't own Buffy the Vampire Slayer or any of the characters mentioned in the cannon.

**A/N:** A huge thank you to everyone who took the time to read and review the last chapter, seeing the hits and reviews never ceases to bring a smile to my face. I hope that you all enjoy this chapter.

**CHAPTER 4**

'_Looked in the mirror lately?'_ Angel heard Buffy's question again in his head as he stared at her in confusion for a moment longer. "Why?" He voiced the question before, he'd really thought about what she'd said. "You don't mean…"

Buffy shrugged as nonchalantly as she could when it involved the vampire in her dreams. "You could be his identical twin brother." Buffy lifted her gaze up from his face to his hair. "Right down to the way you style your hair."

Angel swallowed as he absorbed the information. _'Well, at least that explains why she attacked me.'_ He thought one of his hands coming up to touch the place the now healed cut had been on his cheek. Buffy's eyes followed the movement, before she looked away feeling guilty over attacking him all those weeks ago. Angel cleared his throat as he lowered his hand from his face. "It's not uncommon for a person with a delusion to put uh, the faces of the people they see around them into their…" Angel trailed off as Buffy adamantly shook her head at him.

"You don't understand." She spoke up as he trailed off. "The vampire always looked exactly like you do. Right from the very first dream he appeared in."

Angel was silent for a moment, a frown darkening his brow. _'It couldn't be possible. Shouldn't be possible for her to be seeing him in her dreams of this alternate reality, they'd never met before the first time she'd stepped into his office.'_ Angel cleared the frown off his face and cleared his throat. "So, what did this vampire do next?" He asked, deciding to move on from the subject of what the vampire looked like for now, not wanting to challenge her on it, not after what had happened the first time he'd challenge her view of her reality, he'd have to slowly ease into it over time.

Buffy shifted uncomfortably in her seat as she turned her mind back to the dream that felt realistic enough to be a memory, the fine blond hairs on her arms standing on end as she easily remembered what happened after she had set eyes on the dark vampire for the first time in that cemetery…

****B/A/us****

Buffy swallowed thickly past the lump of fear that had lodged in her throat, her body trembling ever so slightly with the emotion, highly aware that the only weapon she had on her was a small dagger that would be useless against the vampire that seemed to exude power even whilst sitting with apparent calm. _'Oh God, I don't want to die!'_ Buffy thought fearfully as she continued to regard the vampire with trepidation. "Who says I'm alone?" She forced herself to speak past the lump that was refusing to budge from its uncomfortable position.

The vampire chuckled darkly and Buffy backed up a step as she glanced towards the exit of the cemetery wondering if she would be able to make it out of the cemetery and more importantly all the way to her home, before the tall looking vampire could catch her. "I don't see your Watcher anywhere Slayer." The vampire flared his nostrils, exaggerating his unnecessary intake of the air as his voice drew Buffy's gaze back to him. "And I don't smell the stench of that Englishman anywhere nearby either."

Buffy wrinkled her nose. _'Vampires can smell that well? Creepy.'_ She thought, momentarily distracted by the new information. The moment was over quickly as the vampire got to his feet and she got her first glimpse of just how tall he really was. He towered over her and she couldn't help, but retreat a couple more paces her hands clenching into fists at her sides. "What do you want?" Buffy asked, doing her best to keep her voice firm and calm, but a small waver still managed to enter her voice. _'Please don't say to kill me.'_ She thought nervously, her gaze once again going to the cemetery gate.

"Just to talk." The vampire replied with a shrug of his broad shoulders.

Buffy frowned up at the vampire not having expected to hear that from him. "To talk?" She queried uncertainly. From what Merrick had told her talking was the last thing on a vampire's mind when it came to humans.

The vampire nodded and smirked down at her in manner she thought somewhat condescending. "And to help you, if you'll allow me to." He offered.

Buffy frowned up at him, her fear mixing with anger as she narrowed her hazel eyes into a glare. "I may be a 'baby Slayer' as you put it, but I'm not stupid! I know enough to know that vampires don't want to help her." She accused him as she crossed her arms over her chest, her chin tilting up to a stubborn angle as she continued to glare at him.

"I'm not as narrow minded as most vampires." The vampire took a step towards her and this time Buffy held her ground, her head tilting up a little higher so that she could keep her eyes on his face. "I know what you are." He said conspiratorially.

Buffy frowned again. "Well, that's kind of a no brainer. I'm human."

The vampire raised an eyebrow at her that made Buffy's certainty waver slightly. "Is that really what you think? Do you really think that being The Slayer still makes you human?" He asked.

"Of course!" Buffy replied quickly, but there was a waiver of uncertainty entering her voice, at the confidence she heard in his voice and saw in his face.

"Then you really are naive." The vampire told her without preamble and Buffy frowned up at him again. "You're a demon."

"I am not!" Buffy rejected the thought without hesitation. "I'm human! You-You can't just change someone like that by giving them super strength."

"Vampires were once human." The vampire countered.

Buffy shook her head trying to hold onto her certainty. _'There was no way that Merrick wouldn't tell her something as important as that!'_ She thought with a twinge of desperation to the thought. "Yeah, but I didn't suck any blood or get buried in the dirt or anything icky like that. So it's just… it's not possible! I'm as human as I ever was!" She disagree her voice rising in growing panic as his words floated around her brain disconcertingly. _'I'm not a demon, I'm not!'_

The vampire shook his head at her, his lips curving up into a small condescending smile, that made Buffy want to squirm as it made her think that she was about to hear something she'd rather not. "And just where do you think you get your 'preternatural' strength," He emphasised the word to let her know he was correcting her misconception. "And heightened senses if not from a demon?"

Buffy chewed on her lower lip as she tossed his words around in her head, anxiety making her stomach twist into agonising knots of discomfort. "He would have told me." She finally said, though her words lacked the certainty that they had held before.

"Your Watcher?" The vampire made a sound of disgust and he frowned darkly and for a second Buffy contemplated taking another step back from the vampire who's mood seemed to have soured at even just mentioning the word 'Watcher'. _'I wonder what he has against them?'_ She thought curiously, but she didn't get to contemplate that curiosity for long as the vampire started speaking again. "Do you really think that The Watcher's Council cares about you?"

Buffy's brow furrowed slightly at the question. "I, well… uh," She stumbled over her words as she tried to come up with the right words.

"The Council only cares about getting their mission done. Your replaceable, you die all they've got to do is demon up another young girl to order around."

Buffy flinched and a shiver ran up her spine at the image the vampire's words put in her head. _'I never wanted any of this!'_ She thought despondently. "Why are you telling me this?" She asked, her hazel eyes meeting the vampire's dark gaze.

"I told you. I want to help you." The vampire replied.

"But I'm not a demon!" Buffy rejected with a cry that was filled with frustration at the unfairness of it all. _'Why couldn't things just go back to the way they were?'_

The vampire shrugged. "It's not so bad you know. Being a demon, we have a lot more fun than mere mortals."

"A lot more evil, you mean." Buffy rebutted, the knots in her stomach beginning to make her feel queasy.

"Good, evil, it's all relative." The vampire replied casually as he regarded her with calm chocolate brown eyes.

Buffy shook her head at him again, tears burning at the backs of her eyes, the conversation becoming all too much for her. "I'm not a demon! So, just leave me alone!" She shouted, before she turned and fled hoping that the vampire wouldn't chase her, she couldn't deal with anymore tonight, she'd been struggling enough with all these new changes, the last thing she had wanted to hear was that she was a demon. _'I'm not!'_ Buffy told herself. _'I'm not a demon! I'm just as human as I was before this stupid freaky change happened!'_ She tried to assure herself as she felt the intensity of the vampire's gaze on her back right up until she ran through the open gate and continued on down the street.

*****B/A/us***B/A/us*****

"So… The Watcher's Council is evil and this vampire helps you to get away from them, is that right?" Angel asked as he tapped his pen against the last note he had scribbled down.

Buffy remained silent for a moment as she regarded Angel. "You're getting ahead of the telling, Doc." She finally said. "It'll get confusing if I jump back and forth… well more confusing than it is for you at the moment."

"Sorry I'll be patient." Angel apologised a small smile curling up his lips.

Buffy nodded. "Good. Things will become clearer soon though… at least I think they will." She shrugged. "I guess we'll see."

"How much more of this dream do we have to go?" Angel asked as he glanced towards the clock. "Our hours almost up." He explained.

Buffy turned her own gaze to the clock. "Not much more. It should squeeze in." She replied and turned her gaze back to Angel. "I snuck back into my room with a little difficulty," She began again wanting to get her second dream finished for the Doc. "I'm not too bad at climbing trees, if not seriously out of practice at that point. It was more getting the courage to jump from the tree to the sloping roof of the house…"

****B/A/us****

Buffy slipped feet first back into her room and landed with a louder thud than she had intended as she slipped slightly. She remained frozen for a moment her ears straining to pick up any sign that the sound had woken her parents. Her ears easily picked up the sounds of her parents even breathing and she sighed in relief. _'Just where do you think you get your 'preternatural' strength, and heightened senses if not from a demon?'_ She heard the vampire's voice in her head and her relief turned into fear over just how easily she had been able to so easily hear her parents breathing in a room on the other end of the hallway. Buffy squeezed her eyes tightly shut; so tightly that she saw dots of light behind her eyelids. _'I'm not a demon! No person or organisation would do that to a person.'_ Buffy thought firmly. _'Would they?'_ Her brain unhelpfully tacked on, making her shiver uncontrollably and her skin to crawl.

Buffy rubbed her hands up and down her arms to try and relieve the feeling. _'I'm not a demon.' _Buffy thought as she stood and began taking off her grass stained jacket. _'I'm not a demon!'_ She told herself as she threw the jacket in her laundry basket. _'I'm not a demon, I'm not a demon, I'm not a demon,'_ she silently chanted to herself as she quietly got changed into her pyjamas in her dark room. _'Then were does my preternatural strength come from?'_ She asked herself. _'Why'd that stupid nosey vampire have to show up? Having dark good looks doesn't mean that you can go around making my life harder!'_ She thought with irritation as she walked up beside her bed and slipped under the covers. Punching the pillow a couple of times, more to relieve her pent up feelings of frustration over the wackily weird turn her life had taken then to puff up the feathers in the pillow to make it more comfortable. The tight uncomfortable knots that were all filled with the wiggly worms of anxiety still making her stomach feel queasy, making sleep difficult.

*****B/A/us***B/Aus*****

"And that's where the second dream ended." Buffy concluded just before the hour mark and watched as Angel finished off the last word to a sentence, before clipping the pen to the clipboard.

"Thanks for not being to put out with me for bringing you in early today, Buffy." Angel murmured and Buffy smiled as she shrugged as she did her best to pull herself back to the present, away from the tight knots that she had been feeling the ghostly fingers of them in her stomach… or maybe it was just hunger pains.

"No worries. Just remember you're promise to not make it a habit and we'll remain good." She assured him as she stood, stretching her arms over her head unwittingly flashing Angel a small glimpse of her toned stomach for the briefest of moments before she lowered her arms back down with a tired sigh.

"I promise." Angel assured her, an amused smile curling up his lips.

"Good luck with your appointment, Doc." Buffy told him, before turning towards the door.

"Thanks." Angel responded just as Buffy reached the door, Buffy angled back to give him a last look, a smile lighting up her face as she gave him a small wave before she opened the door and stepped out into the hallway, the door closing behind her. Buffy took a breath and closed her eyes to gather herself for a moment. Opening her eyes again, she became aware of the on duty nurse watching her. Buffy met her gaze a little awkwardly for a moment, before she looked away and moved on down the hall heading towards the cafeteria, she would only be a little late for breakfast and there would hopefully still be some coffee left for those allowed the bitter brew.

*****B/A/us***B/A/us*****

Buffy stepped outside into grassy yard of the asylum, her eyes squinting for a moment as they got used to the brightness of the sunlight after the artificial light inside the building. Shading her eyes with a hand, she looked around, before she smiled as she spotted who she was looking for. She walked across the yard, doing her best not to walk through any of the games that were going on as she made her way over to Faith who was lying on the grass as she looked up at the sky. "Hey." She greeted the brunette as she lay herself down on the grass beside her friend.

"Hey, how was the early morning with Doctor Hottie?" Faith asked as she turned her head so that she could look at Buffy.

"How'd you…" Buffy began to ask, before she realized. "Nurses." She answered her only half asked question.

"Chatty little bunch. You should really try to make friends with a couple if you want to be able to keep up with all the goss around here. And trust me there's a lot. Some that's great others that make you wish that you could scrub your ears out and remove what you've just heard."

"You're a gossip queen?" Buffy asked with surprise.

Faith shrugged. "There's not much else to do in here, unless you're looking to cause trouble."

"And you like to do both." Buffy murmured remembering the kiss Faith had planted on her lips during their first meeting,

"In abundance." Faith agreed with a devilish grin. "And just a heads up, if you keep hanging out with me you're going to get the talk soon."

Buffy raised an eyebrow. "The talk… it's not going to be the birds and the bees is it? Cause that was uncomfortable enough when my mom attempted it."

"Bungled it up?" Faith asked with an amused smile.

"Majorly. It ended up being just my mom getting all tongue tied for about the most embarrassing 5 minutes of my life, before ending with 'good talk'. I think she was more relieved that it was over than I was." Buffy said with a small laugh as she remembered the moment.

"At least your mom tried, mine was always too drugged up to care about more than getting her next fix. Oh and asking for beer. She loved shouting for beer at all times of night." Faith told her. Buffy remained silent for a moment, not sure what to say or do, but the brunette saved her by continuing on evidently not wanting her to say anything in response to the unexpected personal reveal she'd dumped on her. "And no it's not going to be the birds and the bees. It's going to be the 'beware of Faith' talk. Cause you know, even talking to me can corrupt the innocent." Faith said sarcastically as she stared up at the sky once again.

Buffy shrugged. "Somehow I doubt they'll consider me worth saving from your toxic grasp. I attacked Doc Hottie remember?"

Faith laughed the mood lightening immediately. "Very true. Welcome to the blacklisted club."

Buffy frowned slightly. "Does that make it harder to get out of here?"

Faith shrugged. "Only if the Doc holds a grudge."

"Oh, well that's good." Buffy murmured. "At least I don't think he's holding a grudge."

"It didn't scar so I'm sure you're all good." Faith replied.

"I think I'd me more scared of a couple of the nurses if I'd scared his face." Buffy admitted.

Faith laughed loudly, tears actually coming to her eyes. "Yeah, you're probably right. A couple of 'em can be damn scary when it comes to a pretty face." She said as her laughter calmed down enough to allow her to talk. The calmness didn't last long as she started laughing again and this time Buffy joined her, Faith laughter infecting her.

*****B/A/us***B/A/us*****

Angel sat in the doctors waiting room, his legs crossed, his eyes focused on the file he had taken with him. A small frown of concentration furrowing his brow as he read over the hasty notes he had taken earlier that morning, expanding on a couple of things that he had made dot points on. Needing a small break from the intense concentration he was putting into Buffy Summers file, Angel closed it and rubbed a hand over the back of his neck to ease the tension that had built up there from the position it had been in. _'I wonder why she's put my face to the main vampire in her alternate reality.'_ He thought as he lowered his hand from his neck and let out a tired sigh. _'Buffy Summers, you are a puzzle, but I swear I'll figure you out and get you back to your normal life.'_ Angel thought with determination, he'd finally built some trust between them the rest wouldn't be so bad. The key he was sure was easing her into truly believing that the dreams were just that dreams and hopefully getting her to recount them for him would help her see that. "Mr. Angel O'Conner." A male voice called and Angel looked up to see his doctor. He stood and carefully placed the file away in his briefcase. _'Finally I can get this general check-up done and I can get back to work.'_ He thought briskly as he walked towards his doctor, whose lateness would put him behind a little tonight.

*****B/A/us***B/A/us*****

Buffy fell onto her bed, it would be lights out soon and that meant soon she would be dreaming once again. Buffy bit her lower lip nervously as she wondered just what was going to happen next in the other world she slipped into so easily whilst she slept. _'Please don't let it be anything to horrible.'_ Buffy thought and shivered gently, she really didn't want it to be anything like the dream she'd had last night…

Buffy turned her thoughts away from it, not wanting to think about it again so close to having to go to sleep, but really there wasn't much else for her to do, but sit and think when she was alone and these days her thoughts always seemed to be revolving around her realistic dreams. _'I wish they'd go away.'_ Buffy thought half-heartedly wanting them to go and yet wanting them to stay so that she could continue feeling connected. Her dreams were the only place she felt she had family and friends in here, even if they were horrible… even if she was horrible. _'I do have Faith,'_ Buffy told herself and a small smile curled up her lips at the thought of the brunette that had decided to approach her a few days ago.

'_I wonder what mom, and dad are doing?'_ Buffy thought just as the lights flicked out plunging her into darkness. With a soft sigh Buffy fumbled under the covers and lay staring unseeingly for long moments as her eyes slowly adjusted to the dark. _'They'd have to be busy… neither of them have even managed to send a letter.'_ She thought a touch of bitterness to it. The lonely feeling of being abandoned making her stomach sink slightly, Buffy gave her head a shake and a frown darkened her brow. _'Don't be stupid!'_ She scolded herself as she turned over onto her side and closed her eyes determined to shake the lonely feeling away with sleep.

**A/N:** Ok, well that's it for now. I hope that you all enjoyed it, next chapter should be longer :)


	6. Chapter 5

**Disclaimer:** I don't own Buffy the Vampire Slayer or any of the characters mentioned in the cannon.

**A/N:** A huge thank you goes out to those who took the time to read and review last chapter and another gigantic thank you goes out to my ever patient beta TGB who had to go through all my grammar and punctuation mistakes you rock hun.

**CHAPTER 5**

Buffy moved her black chip over three of the white chips Faith was using for the match.

A happy smile curving up Buffy's lips as she set her chip down in its new home, before removing the three chips she had hoped her piece over from the checkers board. Faith slapped a hand against her knee.

"Damn B, you're killing me!" the brunette exclaimed, her posture in the chair aggressive as she studied the board competitively.

"Oh please, you were practically throwing me around the board before,"

Buffy replied as she leaned back in her chair waiting for Faith to decide on what she was going to do.

"Buffy Summers?" A nurse called as she walked across the room towards the blond she was looking for.

Buffy groaned disappointedly.

"Oh seriously! It can't be time already!"

Faith shrugged as she focused her gaze from the game to the nurse that was marching towards them with purpose.

"Looks like."

"Damn, I was only just starting to make a comeback," Buffy muttered disappointedly.

Faith shrugged again. "Think of it this way. It saves you from a humiliating defeat by a high school drop out."

"Oh, we are so having a rematch when I get back," Buffy challenged.

Faith smirked as the nurse made it to the table. "You're on," she agreed, the two bumped fists as the nurse frowned down at Buffy her hands on her hips.

"Did you not hear me, Buffy? It's time for your appointment with Doctor O'Conner," the nurse said with an obvious attitude, earning herself a '_what's your problem' _look from Buffy and Faith.

"Remember, dibs on a rematch when I get back," Buffy reminded Faith as she stood up with a soft sigh; whilst Faith began packing up the board.

Buffy gave a last look to the board, wishing that she could have finished the game before her appointment with the Doc then, trailed after the nurse as they both walked towards the doctor's offices.

The nurse pushed open the door that led into the office building, then the two branched off as Buffy headed towards the office door that she had been going through since she had been admitted.

She frowned at the doorknob when it didn't budge, as if it were locked.

Quickly she turned back to face the nurse, who was continuing down the hall - evidentially heading for a short break.

"Hey, it's locked," she shouted in frustration.

The nursed sighed with irritation as she turned to look at Buffy. "He's running a little late. He'll be here," She replied before turning and continuing on her way without another backwards glance.

"Bitch," Buffy muttered under her breath as she leaned against the wall.

"Just great, first an early morning wakeup call and now he's running late," she grumbled as she allowed herself to slide down the wall, coming to rest on the cold floor whilst she waited.

_I totally could have finished that checkers game._

*****B/A/us***B/A/us*****

Angel backed his car back in his allotted parking space outside of the Sunnydale Asylum.

Twisting around in the driver's seat so that he could reach behind, he grabbed his book bag, filled with a laptop and couple of hard copy patient files that he believed needed a little bit of extra work on his part to get them reintegrated safely back into society.

Throwing the strap over his shoulder, he undid his seatbelt, before he reached over and grabbed the cardboard take away cup holder from the passenger seat before opening his door and stepping out into the afternoon Californian sun.

Placing the cup holder that was holding two take away mugs from a local coffee shop on top of the roof for a moment whilst he shut and locked his car, Angel tucked his keys away and checked his watch. He grimaced slightly as he realized the stop for coffee was going to make him a few minutes late back to his office from his lunch break. He snatched the take away mugs from the roof of his car, then quickly made his way up to the front door of the building.

Angel hurried down the hall, nodding a silent greeting at those he passed, as he didn't have time for a proper greeting.

Moments later, he pushed into the hallway to his office, his eyes almost immediately landing on Buffy as she sat close by its locked door.

Almost as soon as he clamped eyes on her, she turned her head so that she could look up at him. "Bout time Doc, I was beginning to think that you weren't gonna show," Buffy exaggerated teasingly as she moved to get to her feet.

"Sorry," Angel apologized a little sheepishly as he made his way to where Buffy was now standing.

"I brought you some hot chocolate this time, to make up for getting you up so early yesterday and for being late today."

Buffy's eyes fell on the two take away mugs from a well-known local coffee shop.

"Well, when you bribe me with hot chocolate, how can I possibly not forgive you?" she said brightly.

Angel lifted out the mug filled with the hot chocolate and handed it to Buffy, who took it gratefully and took a small sip.

"Oh, that is heaven," Buffy murmured happily. "Thanks, Doc O'Conner. It feels like it's been ages since I've had a hot chocolate this good. I do miss mom's though, she used to buy the best little marshmallows, you know the little cubed ones?"

"Is this your dream mom or your real mom?" Angel asked curiously as he unlocked the office door to let them in.

Buffy thought a moment, before answering with a small shrug as she followed Angel into the comfortable sized office.

"Both."

Buffy pushed the door closed behind them as she took a bigger mouthful of her hot drink, feeling more confident now that she knew the temperature.

"Say, how'd your appointment go yesterday? Uh, if you don't mind me asking," Buffy tacked on realizing after she'd asked that it was really none of her business.

Angel chuckled as he set his book bag down on his desk, before taking up his own coffee and taking a much-needed gulp.

"It went fine. It was just a doctor's appointment," he told her.

Buffy gave him a look as she sat herself down in her chair, watching as Angel continued getting ready.

"A doctor, huh? Wait, you'd better not being coming down with a cold. I hate colds, the whole scratchy throat, and runny nose thing is horrible! Plus the red nose thing isn't a good look for me."

Angel chuckled again, before he turned to face Buffy, her file in hand.

"No, I'm not coming down with a cold. It was just a general routine check-up," he assured her as he walked towards his own chair. "And what was that _'A doctor, huh_?' comment all about?" he asked as he sat.

Buffy, who'd taken another mouthful of her hot chocolate, almost choked on it as she fought not to spit it out - holding in the laughter his question inspired in her.

Finally, Buffy managed to swallow it down as she thumped her chest and coughed a little.

"Oh, I just thought it was a little funny. You're a Doctor, going to see a Doctor, you'd think that you'd be able to diagnose yourself."

"Different specialities I'm afraid. That's why this facility also employs an on-sight doctor," Angel

informed her, his lips curling up into a small smile.

"Oh, I know. I just thought it was funny for a moment," Buffy replied with a shrug before she took another mouthful of her hot chocolate.

Angel shook his head slightly in amusement. _She's an odd one,_ he thought as he leaned back against the back of his chair.

"So, shall we get started?" he asked.

Buffy swallowed the mouthful she had just taken. "How can I say no after you've buttered me up with hot chocolate?" she murmured, turning her gaze down to the take away mug that was warming her hands and her stomach.

"The next dream started with me getting up out of bed, my stomach still feeling like it had wriggling worms in it. You know, that queasy, anxiety feeling. The feeling prevented me from getting much sleep and yet I didn't feel like I was half dead like a night without much sleep would normally make me feel…"

****B/A/us****

Buffy hurried into the kitchen, her hands busying themselves with slipping a clip into her hair so that it looked like she had taken the time to do more than brush it.

"Morning, Mom," Buffy greeted as she lowered her hands from her hair and moved towards the fridge.

"Morning, Buffy," Joyce replied, as she looked up from the scrambled eggs she was making.

"How'd you sleep?" She asked.

"Fine," Buffy lied hiding her face in the fridge as she pulled out a single serve yogurt tub and slipped it into her bag, shutting the fridge door.

She stepped towards the fruit bowl, snatching an apple from it, that she stuffed into her book bag as well.

"I've got to go. I'll see you when I get home," Buffy said hurriedly, before she gave her mom a quick peck on the cheek, before moving to hurry for the front door.

Joyce frowned at her daughters back. "Aren't you going to have any breakfast?" she asked disapprovingly.

"I don't have time. I'm running late," Buffy replied, just before her stomach grumbled loudly as if protesting her words.

"Uh," Buffy murmured a little sheepishly as she turned back around to face her mother, her eyes scanning the kitchen for something she could eat quickly on her way to school.

"On second thought," her eyes landed on one of two buttered slices of toast that her mother had set out on a plate for the eggs that she was scrambling.

"I will take some of your toast," she said as she snatched up one of the slices, before hurrying back across the kitchen.

"Buffy!" Joyce admonished, watching her daughter disappear out of the kitchen. A moment later the sound of the front door opening and closing reached her ears.

"What am I going to do with that girl?" she muttered, as she moved her wooden spoon around the pan for a short moment, before moving to put another slice of bread in the toaster, turning off the element as she did so, not wanting her eggs to burn.

****B/A/us****

Buffy hurried down one of the many halls in the school building, her breath coming heavily from the run. She practically skid to a stop outside the door to her first classroom of the day. Opening the door, she breathed a sigh of relief as the classroom was still empty of the teacher.

She shut the door quietly behind her then walked towards the empty seat that her friends had left for her. With a stroke of luck, Buffy managed to slide into it just as the bell rang again and the teacher walked into the room.

Almost immediately, Veronica and Sophia leaned in towards her. "I thought you were going to meet us before school? What happened?" Veronica asked in a low voice as the teacher began talking.

"I slept past my alarm. It's a miracle I made it to school on time."

Veronica racked her eyes over Buffy's form. "So that's why you're looking a little out of sorts… did you even brush your hair before leaving the house?" she asked eyeing Buffy's windswept blond hair.

"Of course she did," Sophia spoke up, before Buffy could. "Buffy would never leave the house without running a brush through her hair." Sophia leaned in closer to her blond friend. "Though, you did put on an odd pair of socks," she whispered, just loud enough for the three of them to hear.

All three girls turned their gaze towards Buffy's feet and to Buffy's horror, she realized Sophia was right, somehow she'd ended up putting on two different coloured socks this morning.

The three girls froze, all conversation dying as they felt the heavy disapproving stare of the teacher and looked up at him.

"If you three are quiet finished, perhaps it wouldn't be too much trouble for you to pay attention to the class."

"Yes Sir," they spoke in unison as Sophia and Veronica leaned away from Buffy and settled back behind their desks.

"Now please open your text books to page 192," he told them, continuing to stare down at them disapprovingly.

****B/A/us****

Buffy frowned at her reflection as she stood in the girls toilets, fiddling with her hair, Veronica's words about it looking un-brushed bothering her.

_It doesn't look that bad… just a little windswept from the run,_ Buffy thought as she used her hands to try and pat it down a little.

_Yeah, just a little windswept, but before you never would have allowed yourself to look less than perfect in public_, her frown deepening at the errant thoughts as she continued to play with her hair. _Not to mention, coming to school wearing odd socks!_ Buffy looked down at her feet, the offending socks adorning her feet making her frown deepen that much more.

_How could I not notice something as obvious as different coloured socks?_ she thought self-consciously, before looking back up at the bathroom mirror, her eyes landing on her windswept hair again, the sounds of two toilets flushing moments after each other filling the bathroom.

Buffy shrugged at her reflection just before the stall doors opened.

_Well, there are worse things than coming to school with odd socks and windswept hair,_ Buffy thought determined to shrug it off and have a better school day than yesterday.

_Like becoming a demon,_ her brain supplied unhelpfully.

An image of the darkly handsome vampire invading her mind's eye made her shiver as she heard his voice in her head again.

"_Then you really are naïve. You're a demon."_

Buffy shivered visibly.

"Are you still stuck on what V said?" Sophia asked, she and Veronica coming to stand on either side of Buffy and washing their hands.

"Don't worry about it, she was just being her bitchy self."

Veronica shot Sophia a look, "I'm not that bitchy," she grumbled.

"Sure you are," Sophia giggled, "Especially after Buffy was late this morning."

Veronica huffed as she dried her hands on a torn off piece of paper towel, "Why were you late? It's not like you to sleep past your alarm," she asked curiously.

"Uh, I had trouble sleeping," Buffy hedged with a small wince as she went back to playing with her hair, slowly getting it to sit as it usually did.

She still couldn't believe that she had accidentally broken her alarm in her sleep instead of waking up to it like she normally would, but then it shouldn't really surprise her that she hadn't wanted to wake up. It had taken her almost the entire rest of the night to actually fall asleep after running into that obnoxious busy body of a vampire last night.

Veronica sighed and stepped up behind Buffy, her hands coming up to touch the length of Buffy's hair. "Seriously, your hair looks fine. It's just a different look for you, ya know. It's kind of nice to know that you don't always look perfect. I was beginning to think that you were some kind of alien designed to make me jealous with your flawless style," She joked unwittingly touching a new raw nerve of Buffy's.

Buffy pulled her hair from Veronica's hands as she turned around to face the girl that was just slightly taller than she was.

"Well, obviously I'm not. I'm just normal regular girl, V," she snapped.

Veronica frowned and backed up a small step, "Geez, I was just teasing, Buffy. There's no need to bite my head off."

Buffy immediately deflated, guilt filling her for taking out her own insecurities on her friend.

"Sorry, V. I'm just tired, I guess."

Veronica stared down at Buffy, her expression un-giving for a moment, before she relaxed.

"Yeah, well. You buy me a coffee scroll for lunch and all will be forgotten."

Buffy nodded her agreement, needing to buy something for herself for lunch as well.

"Your parents trying to show you they care by making you lunches again?" Sophia asked as they began walking towards the exit.

Veronica nodded and groaned in irritation.

"I wish they'd stop reading those books on parenting teenagers. I mean, my mom cannot make a decent sandwich to save her life." She reached into her book bag and took out a cling-wrapped sandwich… or what was supposed to be a sandwich.

"I can't even bear the thought of attempting to eat this sorry thing," Veronica muttered as she tossed it into a bin they were passing. "I'll be so glad when they both go back to not trying so hard."

"I think it's kind of nice, that they're trying. It has to be better than indifference," Buffy murmured.

"Speak for yourself," Veronica muttered. "They're totally starting to cramp my style. They were even talking to me about getting a part time job. As if they expect me to do physical labour at some hack department store."

Buffy looked down at her own hands, hands that had been doing physical labour recently, when a couple of days ago she had thought along the same lines as Veronica.

Her eyes landed on the broken nail that sat amongst the ones that still looked as perfect as they had before her climb down the tree. Quickly she curled them, placing the tips of her fingers out of sight, not wanting to have to explain why she hadn't fixed them up yet.

"Speaking of cramping styles, I can't believe Mr. Baldwin gave us a two thousand word essay each on describing the detrimental effect of the atomic bomb! All for talking a little in his stupid class. What's so important about the stupid war anyway?" Sophia grumbled.

Veronica nodded her agreement, "I know right! Like talking in his class is like a sin or something. Maybe if history wasn't such a snooze-fest we wouldn't talk during his stupid classes."

Sophia glanced over at a clock decorating the wall of the hall.

"We should get our books for our next class, the bells going to ring soon and I'd hate to be late for Mr. Tanner's class." She said a little dreamily, as she thought of the hottest teacher in the school, that taught their literature class.

"Oh, true, I forgot he was our next class," Veronica said thoughtfully.

The two picked up their pace, getting ahead of Buffy a few paces before noticing that Buffy hadn't immediately joined in on their enthusiasm.

"Come on, Buffy. We don't want all the best seats to be taken," Veronica urged and beckoned her with an impatient wave of her arm.

Buffy sighed and plastered a smile on her face. She picked up her pace as she forced herself to focus her thoughts on her friends and not the worries that were making her uneasy and uncomfortable in herself.

"Coming!"

*****B/A/us***B/A/us*****

"Your friends in this dream seem very…" Angel paused as he searched for a descriptive word that didn't sound insulting.

"You can say shallow," Buffy assured him. "I was pretty damn shallow myself for a while there."

"You, you or dream you?" Angel asked.

"What does it matter?" Buffy asked as she crossed her arms over her chest as she stared at him unblinkingly.

"It matters that you focus on the difference between what's real and what's not. The more you focus on those differences, the easier it will be for you to keep the two separate."

Buffy frowned slightly as she pondered on what he'd said, before she visibly relaxed in the chair again.

"Dream me then. My friends in real life are nothing like Veronica and Sophia. They're… nicer and the conversations are more interesting than what the latest fashions are. I mean looking good is important, but there is only so much talk about it a girl can take without falling asleep."

"Good," Angel told her. "Focus on those things and remember them whenever you feel like your dreams are getting too realistic."

Buffy nodded slightly a frown still darkening her brow.

"They're always too realistic," she mumbled as she shifted uncomfortably in her chair.

She raised the take away mug to her lips, swallowing the last little bit of the now lukewarm liquid.

She was aware of Angel's gaze following her progress as she walked across the room and over to the small bin by his desk, dropping the empty cup into the bin.

She took a breath as she procrastinated slightly by the desk, seeking to find a comfortable spot mentally, to once again begin.

"The uh," Buffy cleared her throat. "The rest of my school day continued on in much the same fashion."

She began again, making her way back to the vacated chair, glad that she had found a mental spot that didn't leave her feeling completely exposed.

"Veronica wasn't too happy when I had to decline going out shopping after school with her and Sophia, but it was either that or risk Merrick tracking me down in that cheap bucket of bolts that he drove…"

****B/A/us****

"Seriously?" Veronica exclaimed shocked as she stared at Buffy, her mouth slightly agape.

"But you always go with us," Sophia exclaimed, as she too stared at Buffy wide eyed. "You love updating your wardrobe."

"You've been talking about this trip for weeks. What could possibly be so important that you'd blow us off?" Veronica asked, as she crossed her arms over her chest.

Buffy shifted sheepishly wondering just what she could say, she had never been a very good liar.

"Oh I get it!" Sophia said loudly, an excited glint in her eyes. "You've got a hot date tonight, dontcha and you just don't wanna tell us!"

Buffy almost blanched, but managed to nod her head in agreement.

"Uh, yeah, you could say that." She murmured. _More like a stodgy, crazy, old slavedriver._

Veronica frowned, "You mean you're standing us up for some guy."

Sophia nudged Veronica with her elbow.

"Come on now V, you know Buffy wouldn't be ditching us for anyone less than Erwin 'Salty Goodness' Daniels."

Veronica sighed and uncrossed her arms begrudgingly, "Well, I suppose if it is for Erwin, then that's forgivable. But we'll be demanding deets tomorrow," She pointed a finger at Buffy's chest, in an almost accusing manner.

Buffy held up her hands, "When have I ever held out on you guys?"

"Precisely, V. You need to relax more," Sophia urged.

"I can't! Not until mom and dad go back to normal, this whole _we're interested in your life_ garbage is messing with my head."

"Come on, V, some good old fashioned retail therapy will make everything seem a whole lot better," Sophia soothed, as she placed her hands on the girl's shoulders and began urging her towards the school gates.

She looked over her shoulder at Buffy, who was watching them go regretfully.

"Have a good date, Buffy. We'll see you tomorrow."

"Yeah, see ya!" Buffy called after them, wishing that she was joining them. Her clothes were getting awfully close to being last month's fashion, but Merrick would no doubt track her down, and do something horribly embarrassing like dragging her out of her favourite store.

Buffy grimaced at the image, before sighing.

"I wish I did have a date with Erwin instead," she muttered, before making her own way to the school gate and starting off down the path with a great deal of reluctance.

****B/A/us****

Buffy sat on Merrick's couch with one leg crossed over the other, a nail file in hand as she examined her nails and carefully filed them so that they were all even and perfectly rounded to her liking.

Aware all the while that Merrick was watching her; had been since she'd pulled out the pair of nail scissors she had detoured into a department store to get one her way. His obvious annoyance kept her at it longer.

Her enjoyment of his frustration was only part of the reason why she was taking her time, the other was she wasn't sure what to tell him about what had happened last night.

Should she tell him about the vampire that had approached her and what he had told her, or should she keep quiet about it all? She wanted to ask, wanted to know what the truth was, but was also afraid of the answer she would get. No matter how many times she told herself that the vampire was lying, she couldn't seem to brush the vampire's words aside as a complete falsehood…

What if he was actually right, and The Watcher's Council had turned her into some kind of demon? The _what if_ was killing her, but the fear was choking off the words that would voice the question.

"Do you really think that is a valuable use of our time?" Merrick finally asked, breaking the stretching silence.

Buffy calmly looked up from her nails, that were finally looking completely healthy and well cared for again.

"A girl needs to look her best, it's good for your health," she replied smoothly, setting the file to the last rough edge on the nail she was working on.

Merrick frowned at his tiresome charge, "We only have a short amount of time, before you have to be home preparing for patrol," he said urgently.

"Oh, that reminds me," Buffy said as she looked up once again to settle her gaze on her Watcher.

"Can I take a pass on patrolage tonight? I got assigned a two thousand word essay due tomorrow."

Merrick's lips thinned as he pursed them with irritation.

"No you cannot take a pass on patrolling tonight, it is far too important for you to miss. Especially, for something as common as an essay."

"W-What are you… you've got to be kidding me!" Buffy spluttered, as she threw down her nailfile next to her nail scissors.

"How am I supposed to finish my essay?"

Merrick shrugged, "Do some before and after your patrol," he suggested in a tone that clearly said it wasn't his problem.

"But… my brain can't work that hard," Buffy whined.

"You'll be surprised at just how hard your brain can work when you put your mind to it," Merrick informed her, heading towards the training room.

"Now that you've stopped wasting our time, it's time to get to work, Ms. Summers," Buffy groaned despondently, but got up and trudged after him.

****B/A/us****

Buffy walked cautiously through the front door of her home and sighed in relief to find it void of raised voices, in fact the only sounds in the house were those that were coming from the ovens fan in kitchen and those coming from the living room's TV.

Buffy shut the front door and started on her way down the hallway, sniffing appreciatively as she headed towards the living room.

"Something smells good," she complimented, as she made it to the living room doorway to see her mom sitting on the couch in front of the TV.

"Of course it does. Its homemade pizza," Joyce replied as she looked up from the TV to grace her daughter with a smile.

"Ooh, yummy," Buffy replied, walking over to the couch and sitting next to her mother; their gazes returning to the TV.

After a few moments, the news flicked to an ad and Buffy tilted her head as she watched a physically fit woman on a piece of gym equipment.

_Hmm, I wonder if I should get some of those gym clothes things?_ She thought as she watched the woman demonstrate how to use the equipment the ad was advertising.

"How can something that makes you all sweaty and gross feel so good?" She spoke without thinking as the ad wound to a close.

Joyce looked at her daughter with clear surprise, "What would you know about working up a sweat in a gym, Buffy?" she asked with amusement. She knew that the only form of physical activity her daughter ever engaged in was as a cheerleader.

Buffy, realizing her mistake hurried to fix it.

"Uh, one of my friend's is uh, worried about her weight, so we've started going to a gym together a couple nights a week," she lied.

Joyce frowned in concern, "Buffy, girl's your age shouldn't be worried about your weight. You should be getting out and having fun with your friends, and concentrating on your homework."

Sensing that her mother was on the verge of giving her one of her 'I care about you' lectures, she moved to cut it off before her mom could get on a role.

"So, where's dad at?" Buffy asked, and immediately felt guilt as a pained expression flicked across her mother's face and her arms crossed over her chest.

A frown darkened her brow, the mention of the man in her life obviously putting her in a foul mood.

_Sorry mom._

"Your father's working late tonight," Joyce replied curtly, her eyes going back to the TV.

_And that'd be why we're having dad's favourite tonight,_ Buffy thought.

_She probably won't do the dishes tonight either so that he can see what he's missed out on._ _I hope I never get that jaded._

"I'm gonna go have a shower and uh, do some homework," Buffy excused herself as she got up. Her mother nodded, but not much else, immediately making Buffy wince in guilt again, before she turned and fled out of the room and up the stairs, hoping that by the time she was called to dinner her mother would be back in a good mood.

****B/A/us****

Buffy stared down at the folder she had splayed out before her on the bed.

A deep frown of concentration was pulling down her brow as she stared down at the page that only had her name, the title of the essay and the date on it. She had been staring at the page for 15 minutes now, and still nothing had come to mind on how to even start the damnable thing.

A dull stress headache pressed uncomfortably at her temples and behind her eyes as she shifted her gaze from the page she was supposed to be writing on to the textbook that was supposed to have all the answers she needed.

_Come on brain work!_ She told it with growing frustration as she waggled the pen between two of her fingers; waggled it so hard that it almost flew across the room.

She threw down the pen in frustration. Perhaps, she shouldn't have put so much effort into blow waving her hair after her shower. She had been procrastinating, and really hadn't wanted to start on the essay. Besides, it had been totally worth the effort; her hair looked great… only now she worried that she wouldn't get it done at all and be landed with an undeserved after school detention.

"I told him my brain doesn't like to work this hard and now it's all painful," Buffy muttered, falling back gently so that she could rest against the headboard.

"Come on brain, just this last little thing and I'm done with brain power for the day. It's only two thousand words," Buffy murmured in an attempt to persuade her tired brain into compliance.

Buffy sat up, reaching for her pen with a painstaking groan and pulled her folder closer to her lap.

_I have to at least write one sentence before I leave this room._

"Buffy, dinner's ready!" Joyce shouted, her voice carrying all the way up to Buffy's room.

Immediately the pen dropped from Buffy's hand and she hurried out of her room.

Her feet pounded down the stairs in her haste; her previous thought completely disregarded in the face of her mom's homemade pizza.

****B/A/us****

Buffy re-entered her bedroom from her private bathroom, her mouth feeling minty fresh from having taken the time to clean her teeth, she glanced over at her still unstarted essay that was splayed out over her bed.

"No chance," She decided, her brain still too tired to even want to sit in front of it again.

_I'll do it after, _was her only thought as she walked over to her wardrobe so that she could put on a more suitable jacket for the cooler night air.

****B/A/us****

Buffy moved swiftly through the cemetery, her hair flying out behind her as she ran past tombstones.

A group of four vampire's chased after her, their growls dogging her every step.

Making it to an old thick trunked tree, Buffy darted behind it and pressed her back to it, her heart was pounding in her chest from exertion.

Buffy waited with baited breath, as the deep, growling chuckles of the vampires reached her ears.

"Come out, come out little girl. Hiding isn't going to help you, we can smell you," one of them, probably the leader of their little group, cajoled as he stalked closer.

Buffy waited, one of her hands curled about her stake as she lifted it carefully out from its hiding place.

With difficulty she waited until, she felt that the vampire was close enough and with a movement that was as quick as she could manage, she swung out from behind the tree, her free hand extended she grasped the surprised vampire by the back of his head and slammed his face against the rough bark of the tree.

"Who's hiding?" she asked as she released the surprised vampire's head.

The vampire clutched his hands to his face as he stumbled back from the tree, stunned by the blow whilst his companions stared on in complete shock at the sudden turn around.

Using the moment to her advantage, Buffy thrust her stake forward, the pointed end aimed for the vampire's chest.

_Don't miss the heart_, she urged herself as the stake penetrated the vampire's chest.

Remembering to pull the stake out this time, she waited as the vampire gave her a look of disbelief.

"A girl," he muttered, before he disappeared into dust; crumpling in on himself.

"Slayer," the vampire that had been second in command growled, whilst the two behind him exchanged nervous looks.

Buffy shrugged, with an air of calm she didn't completely feel as she stared down the three vampires; she'd never had to face so many at once before.

"Guilty," she quipped, glancing from one to the other, wondering which would attack her first.

"Die!" the new leader of the small group growled, quickly advancing on her; his fangs bared at her as he threw a punch.

Buffy hit the swinging arm away from her, before she swiftly raised her leg, kicking him square in the balls and forcing him to his knees.

With two other vampire's waiting in the wings that could join in at any time, it was no time to fight fair.

The vampire cupped himself through his ratty jeans were in serious need of a wash.

Buffy punched him under the jaw, forcing the vampires head back, before she thrust the stake into his chest with more confidence than with the first vampire of the night.

She didn't even wait to see him 'poof' into dust before she stepped around him, her gaze on the two remaining vampire's that hadn't moved a muscle to back up their superior.

"So, who's next?" she asked as she stood at the ready.

The two vampire's exchanged looks once again, before turning their amber gazes back to her, terror shining in their depths.

"Let's get out of here!" one cried to the other.

Without a moment's more hesitation, they turned tail and ran as fast as their legs could carry them.

Buffy cocked her head ever so slightly to the side as she watched the two run; not feeling up to giving chase despite her success that night.

"That's new," she murmured. "Training must actually be working, it didn't seem so hard this time," she observed as she began walking once again.

Her hands did their best to straighten out her clothes as she walked, heading towards home.

She felt like she could do more tonight, but she still had that essay to complete before she could turn in.

****B/A/us****

Buffy walked across the street, her hands buried in the pockets of her jacket as she made her way through the night; torn between the desire to hurry home and the desire to procrastinate further in doing her essay.

"Hello again," she heard a somewhat familiar male voice speak.

"Gah!" Buffy exclaimed, the sudden sound of his voice startling her. She swung around to see the darkly handsome vampire from the night before, practically right behind her.

_How did I not know that he was there? And just how long has he been following me?_ She thought as she took a step back, putting some much needed space between them.

"It's you again," she muttered warily, slipping her hands out of her jacket pockets and attempting to reach for the stake that was hidden in amongst her clothes.

"There's no need for that Baby Slayer. I'm not here for violence," the vampire assured her as he held up his hands in a sign meaning no harm.

Buffy frowned up at him, "No, you're just here to tell me how non-human I am," she grumbled.

Her hand was still hovering, ready to go for her stake at the slightest sign of needing to defend herself.

The vampire shrugged as he began walking again, heading in the exact same direction that she needed to go. "Truth hurts, babe."

Buffy stared at his retreating form for a moment, before reluctantly following after him; his slow pace easily allowing her to catch up to his longer stride.

"Except for the small part where you're lying," she countered stubbornly, unwilling to admit to the unknown vampire that his words had caused her more than a little doubt about her own humanity.

"Am I?" the vampire replied calmly; too calmly for Buffy's strained nerves.

"Look whatever BS agenda you're trying to work here, can you wait to work it another night?"

Buffy snapped waspishly.

"I've got homework I've got to get finished. And if there is something worse than getting extra homework, it's getting an after school detention for not doing the extra homework," she complained, unintentionally going off on a small tangent as she expressed some of her vexation at having to do the essay that still hadn't been started.

"Relax, Baby Slayer," the vampire said with obvious amusement as he stared down at her.

"I'm only here to introduce myself tonight, seeing as you ran off last night before I could."

Buffy paused in her stride, staring at the vampire who'd stopped and turned slightly so that he could look back at her.

"Introduce yourself, as in you're planning to drop by again?"

"Multiple times," the vampire agreed with a nod. "That's what friend's do, isn't it?"

Buffy frowned slightly. "Who says I want to be your friend?" she asked him suspiciously.

The vampire smirked at her. "Well, then, Baby Slayer, I guess you're stuck with an annoying acquaintance that keeps popping by for a visit."

Buffy's frowned deepened in her growing annoyance at the strange vampire that seemed intent on pestering her.

"Stop calling me that!"

The vampire grinned down at her; flashing the pearly whites of his teeth.

"Whatever you say, but, I suggest you introduce yourself in that case," he prompted smugly.

_Stupid, arrogant, no good vampire!_ Buffy thought as she glared up at him, before she sighed in resignation. _I suppose it would be nice to put a name to the face._

"Buffy," She finally said.

"Angelus," the vampire introduced himself as he extended a hand out for her to shake.

Buffy looked down at the hand, before turning and continuing on down the street.

"It's rude to not shake an offered hand," the vampire called Angelus shouted after her.

Buffy shrugged and spoke without pausing, "It's rude to call someone not human," she retorted and swore that she heard the vampire chuckle as she continued to walk away from him.

*****B/A/us*****

"And then I woke up," Buffy rounded off her account of her third dream and pushed herself up to her feet, knowing that the hour was practically up.

"Thanks again for the hot chocolate, Doc."

"You're welcome, Buffy," Angel replied as he finished off a sentence, before looking up from the page. "And Buffy?" he called, causing Buffy to pause and turn back to look at him curiously.

"In your dream, did you ever tell your Watcher about Angelus? You never said."

"Didn't I?" Buffy murmured thoughtfully, before she shook her head. "No, I couldn't," Buffy hesitated. "The dream me," she corrected herself earning a smile from Angel, "couldn't bring herself to ask," she answered, before heading out the door intent on finding Faith and getting her rematch.

Angel looked down at his notes, his gaze landing on the name of the vampire that was haunting Buffy's dreams; a vampire that looked like his twin and bore a name so very similar to his own. He underlined the vampire's name, a pensive expression on his face as he pondered over the significance if there was any at all.

**A/N:** I hope that you all enjoyed this chapter, I'll try and have the next one up soon :)


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